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In America, there are two genders. There are two sexes. It is not common knowledge that sex and gender are different and that there are multiple sexes. When I applied for jobs, I was asked about my gender and given two options. Male or female? I didn't even have the option I needed to answer an optional question. I wasn't sure if they meant to ask about my sex or my gender. I was forced to choose or decline.
I have a tool in my toolbox for schizoaffective disorder that I haven’t written about before. The tool is earplugs.
Every individual will have a unique experience with verbal abuse recovery. Each situation is different, resulting in a personalized journey for healing that requires changing tools and strategies. However, navigating which methods to use during your recovery process can be overwhelming. It can help to have various ways to manage the aftereffects of verbal abuse.
An area of my anxiety that has been difficult to overcome has been productivity anxiety. Since I was young, I’ve held myself to high standards that I’ve found to be unreachable. When I was younger, these standards meant getting good grades and being successful in school. As I got older, these standards extended to every other area of life.
If you have stumbled across any article on this blog, it will come as no shock that eating disorder recovery is an integral, foundational part of my life. I do not always operate from the healthiest mindset in my relationship with food, exercise, or body image. But I am open about all facets of my continuous healing process, whether it's a step forward or a slip backward. In fact, I tend to be much more transparent and vulnerable online than I am in daily face-to-face interactions. When someone I know in real life inquires about my fitness or nutrition habits (because, to the surprise of no one, this a body-conscious culture), I notice my cheeks start to flush, and I choose the vaguest answer possible. That reaction strikes me as curious, though. Why am I still embarrassed about my eating disorder after all these years?
Dating and depression don't mix very well. When you feel terrible about yourself because of depression, it's not the best time to meet new people and try to develop healthy connections. But if your depression is longstanding, does that mean you shouldn't date? Can you successfully date while depressed?
Generally speaking, I'm not a very good liar, but I am excellent at lying to myself. I count myself amongst the majority in this department. Most people value honesty and seek to use it in their relations with others, but when it comes to themselves, they may be so adept at deception that they don't even know they're doing it.
I had somehow convinced myself that my life would be over the moment I walked out of there, completely devoid of confidence and self-worth. That’s a tad dramatic, but at the time, I didn’t know better; I was so clouded by feelings of self-doubt to see beyond the tragedy (as I would have described it at the time) unfolding right before my eyes. You’re a little lost, so let me dial it back for you.
When treating bipolar disorder, I think it's critical to gain bipolar mood stability first and only then tweak up or down as needed. That means that if you're in a depression right now (and let's face it, that's when people seek help the most), the goal isn't to treat depression, per se, but rather to gain bipolar stability. Of course, I'm not the only one who thinks this. The esteemed psychiatrist Dr. Jim Phelps agrees: treatment should focus on bipolar mood stability first.
I have a long history with perfectionism. In fact, I cannot recall a time in my life when this fixation wasn't driving my performance and achievements. I suspect this is one reason I have always been drawn to activities or pursuits that measure excellence in visible, quantifiable terms. In school, I only accepted straight As. In athletics, I gravitated to sports like archery, where I could aim for the center of a literal bullseye. And in my career, I have turned to writing—a skill based on technical precision. But as I continue to heal my thoughts and behaviors from the residue of anorexia, I am learning to appreciate that eating disorder recovery is not about perfection.
I'm lucky now to be in a job that lets me listen to high-energy music while I work. Giving my brain something fun to have on in the background actually makes my "foreground" thoughts less likely to wander. Gotta do what works best for you!
My name is Natasha Tracy, and I'm the Blog Manager here. I want to offer my thoughts.
If you've left a person for being abusive, it's really important not to go back to that relationship before the abusive partner gets help. It's not enough to apologize; the abusive person needs professional help. I recommend he get help from a psychologist who specializes in abuse. Also, you may want to get help for you and your kids, as an abusive relationship needs healing for all.
See here for our resources page: https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/resources/mental-health-hotline-numbers-and-referral-resources
Good luck.
-- Natasha Tracy