The Struggles of Dating with Depression

July 18, 2017 Ashley Horsfall

Dating is hard, but dating with depression comes with its own struggles. Read this to learn about some of the issues mental illness poses in relationships.

It's hard to find love, and dating with depression feels impossible sometimes. Dating with depression comes with unique struggles in addition to the usual ones. I've struggled with identifying bad relationships, asking the right questions, and so much more (Depression Makes Social Interaction Stressful). Thankfully, recent realizations have provided relief, so I'm hopeful that dating with depression will improve.

Lessons Learned While Dating with Depression

You Must Face Tough Questions

When do you tell somebody you are dating that you have depression? How should you approach mental illness with somebody you are not committed to yet? What expectations should you put on this other person? These are all questions you have to ask when you face the prospect of dating during a tough time in your life. It's hard when it does not feel like there is a right answer, but I'm becoming more honest about my needs and limitations.

Depression Means Asking for Help Sometimes

This is the first year I have realized that I was actually ready to be a partner. I wasn't healthy before, and it's easy for me to see that now. I understand how important it is to ask your partner for help with depression. I'm not scared to ask anymore. Now I know what kind of support I need, and I know what is reasonable to expect. I don't let my self-esteem prevent me from feeling that I'm not worth my needs. I try not to let myself fall into pits of despair where I can't find the motivation to be a good partner -- and it's still hard.

A Bad Relationship Can Worsen Depression

Nobody is to blame for my depression, but I have found that allowing myself to stay in a bad relationship has never helped it. It took a long time for me to realize what made my former relationships "bad," and it always had to do with lack of support on both sides. Now that I have more experience, I pay close attention to interactions that make me feel worthless or sad.

Healthy Dating with Depression Video

It is not easy to be in a relationship when you have depression, and it's certainly not easy to be in a relationship with somebody who has it, either. Watch my video about my relationship struggles. Then, let me know how you handle dating with depression.

See Also:

Dating with Depression: How Can I Hide My Depression?

APA Reference
Horsfall, A. (2017, July 18). The Struggles of Dating with Depression, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, July 20 from

Author: Ashley Horsfall

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