New Year’s Resolutions: The Pressure Is Bad for Mental Illness

New Year's is not such a bad time. It's about looking back and learning, I think. We can look back over the year and determine why we did what we did and what it is we should do about it. It's about new beginnings, fresh beginnings, a clean slate. All of that is lovely really.

But with all that comes the dreaded New Year's resolution - the thing we say, hand to heart, that we will endeavour to do in the following year. But really, these resolutions have a negative impact on the mentally ill.

New Year's Resolutions Add Pressure to Life the Mentally Ill Don't Need

I resolve to lose weight. I resolve to live on a budget. I resolve to take my meds. I resolve to exercise. I resolve to quit drinking coffee. I resolve to quit smoking. And so on and so forth into January.

And there's nothing wrong with any of these things. Some people want to lose weight or budget their money. Some people want to exercise and stop drinking coffee. I have no problem with any of that.

The problem I have is with the concept of a "resolution." Resolution is an act of resolving or determining; firmness of purpose. In other words, it's something you can't come back from. One can't resolve to hate coffee one moment and then invest in Tim Horton's the next.

And that's pressure. It's an additional layer of pressure to say you resolve to do something. Now, suddenly, you feel like a shlub if you can't do it. Or, more precisely, your delicate self-esteem takes a hit.

But Every Day with Mental Illness is a Struggle

But as it happens, mental illness doesn't exist in sweeping gestures, it happens in teardrops and flashes of anger. It happens in delusions and flights of ideas. Mental illness isn't a life, it's itty bitty particles that make up a life.

And those itty bitty particles must be fought one at a time, one day at a time, one thought at a time if there is any hope of changing even a one of them. And that's a lot to handle without the pressure of a resolution hanging over your head.

So What's a Mentally Ill Person to Do If They Want to Change?

Change it OK. Healthy changes are even better. But try the inch-by-inch approach. Right now, and this moment, I will exercise. No thought about tomorrow and certainly no thought about an entire year. Just for today I will take all my meds as prescribed.

Tomorrow you can have the same thought. Or not. But you do not fail because one day you do not match your new, changed behavior because tomorrow you have the chance to do it all over again.

You don't need a resolution to change your life, you just need a thought. And that thought can happen any day of the year.

Oh, and did I mention that New Year's Eve pressure isn't my favourite thing either?

PS: If you really want to have a resolution, you could try one of these.