Uneven Edge: Turn Mental Illness Into A Strategic Advantage

As Tiberius said to Caligula, “It is better to be feared than to be loved.”

You history buffs out there will recall that Caligula took these sage words to heart and ruled ancient Rome with a flamboyant accent on intimidation.

Was Caligula crazy? Frankly, it’s too soon to tell. But one thing is certain, in fairy tales, foreign films, comic books and ballads – crazy is way scary yes indeed.

Even bad guys – (guys so bad they would tear the tag off a mattress – so thoughtless and cruel they would blabber away at the top of their lungs in a crowded Starbucks – so insensitive to the fate of our dear mother earth they would purchase and drive a Hummer!) – are frightened by the whackadoomious among us.

Speaking as a card-carrying resident of Cookoopantsatopolis, I am here to tell you that all of us have been overlooking a significant strategic opportunity! Instead of feeling contrite and embarrassed about our disabilities – (or “differences” if you prefer) – let’s flaunt them! Naturally we would all prefer to be loved for who we really are, but candidly, will that be happening soon? I thought not. So, in the interim, let’s find ways to make fear of the mentally ill a wedge in the door that opens up into social acceptance.

Let’s inundate Café Press with wearable attitude that flaunts our dreaded flaws in the faces of fearful fellows, foes, friends, fiends and frauds.

BUMPER STICKERS are a logical, inexpensive place to start. Intimidate every single person you pass on the road with surly sentiments like these:

Bipolar And I Brake Randomly

Just Because I’m Paranoid Doesn’t Mean You’re Not Following Me

Tourette Speaks! Listen Up!

Caution: Narcoleptic At Wheel

T-SHIRTS offer a great way to merge in-person aggression with sartorial splendor. What unsuspecting citizen wouldn’t think twice seeing a proud Whackadoomian sporting one of these shirts?

I'm With Stupid & So Am I

CLUB MED [Pill bottle Logo]

Ask me About My Alternate Reality

Masochists Anonymous

COFFEE MUGS, believe it or not, were once used to hold coffee before consuming it. Now, in offices, bowling alleys, and nail salons – they are used to express philosophies, sentiments, and whimsical quips thought to be too dull for use by the Hallmark Corporation.

Time to perk them up with in-your-sane-face zingers they’ll notice.

Maybe I LIKE Being Agitated!

I'll Sleep When I'm Dead!

Caffeine! The Next Best Thing To Mania!

It’s Colombian, It Gets Me High, And You Can’t Arrest Me

I don’t know about you, but every psychiatrist I ever went to recommended that I take pride in being myself – well – perhaps its time for Whackadoomians to move on up to the next phase!