How to Ask for Help on Bad Mental Health Days

Bad mental health days hurt, in no small part because they make me feel so alone. It's hard for me to ask for help, but I'm trying to get better at it because it turns out, having some support can make a world of difference on bad mental health days.

On Bad Mental Health Days, Work Around Obstacles to Help

When it comes to asking for help on bad mental health days, it's important to recognize the obstacles that have kept you from asking for help so far. Only then can you work around those obstacles and get the support you need. These are the obstacles I typically encounter when it comes to asking for help, and some of the workarounds I've devised.

• Shame: When we're ashamed of our bad mental health days, we are reluctant to reach out to others because we fear that they will judge us as harshly as we're judging ourselves. The solution? Pretend you are one of your own friends. If one of your friends was struggling and texted you for assistance, would you be annoyed and upset, or would you be relieved that they asked for help and eager to do what you can? You'd probably be the latter. Give yourself the same acceptance and send that message.
• Hopelessness: Sometimes when we're struggling, it can feel a bit hopeless to reach out for help, because what could anyone really do or say, right? If I can't make myself shower after an hour of trying, what difference will it make if I text someone about it? Well, for me at least, it can make all the difference in the world. Sometimes, just telling someone that I'm stuck helps get me unstuck, and when that doesn't work, his or her encouragement can ease some of the bad feelings I'm having just long enough for me to make it from the bed to the shower. Don't underestimate the power of acknowledgment and encouragement.
• Fear of rejection: On bad mental health days, it can be really hard to open up to people because we're afraid of how they'll react. The best way I've found to ease my fear is to properly express my expectations. If I want someone to commiserate with me, but he or she thinks I want them to find a solution to my problem, then we'll both end up disappointed and frustrated. Instead, now when I reach out to a friend, I try to tell that person exactly what I need, whether that's a crying shoulder or some helping hands.

The Benefits of Asking for Help on Bad Mental Health Days

Learning to ask for help on my bad mental health days has made them much more manageable. I feel less alone, I get more accomplished, and my friends reciprocate by opening up to me more often, which I love. Even though it's scary and sometimes difficult to reach out, I promise it's worth it.

Do you have any tips for how to ask for help on bad mental health days? Please share them with the community in the comments.