One thing I've learned is to take action in alcohol recovery and stop arguing. Recent well-publicized articles criticizing 12-step programs have been making the social media rounds and set off another flurry of commentary and response (of which I'm a part). I'd like to suggest, however, doing something that in some ways is becoming easier and easier to avoid in the world of instant information--get off the Internet, stop arguing and take action for alcohol recovery.

I recently celebrated some general life and sobriety milestones. These are good things; things I should be--and am--happy about. But even positive milestones in sobriety can be emotionally fraught, and that's a potentially dangerous situation for people in addiction recovery.

I used to lie all the time. In my addiction, I lied constantly to cover up my drinking (not that it worked). Even before I started drinking, I lied about my mental health issues because I thought if people knew what was going on inside my head, they would think I was weird (they still did). It wasn't until I got sober that I realized how dishonest I had been on a daily basis and the importance of honesty in addiction recovery.

Making a resolution to stop an old behavior, or start a new one, is about more than changing the action itself. We also need to develop a lifestyle and environment around the change we want to make. Some people blame the concept and say our annual failings only serve as proof that New Year's resolutions don't work. In reality, the reasons we fail have less to do with making resolutions and more to do with the fact that we lack the lasting motivation that will sustain us through thick and thin. When you're ready to quit drinking, stop smoking, or get off drugs, it doesn't matter if you start on January 1st or July 14th. If you're ready now, here are four essential steps to making that a lasting change in the New Year.

These are some of my favorite responses to the question, "Why aren't you drinking?"

Concerns over having a clean and sober holiday pop up all year round, but especially in the fall and winter months. Every year it happens -- people start talking about the holidays, complaining, planning and worrying. It seems like starting in October, the curmudgeons start to become more vocal. Personally, I enjoy the season, although it can certainly be stressful. Most of us field a lot of expectations, invitations and obligations in November and December. For those of us in addiction recovery, all these events can bring addiction triggers, especially when others are drinking around us and staying clean and sober can become a challenge.

Recognize other ways of dealing with stressful situations in order to avoid drinking or using your substance of choice.

On a warm October day, I hurried to to class, maneuvering around groups of slower-moving students. I checked my phone - fifteen minutes before class started, enough time to pop into the mini mart and buy some iced tea or soda. Approaching the entrance, I smelled the faint scent of fresh cigarette smoke from a passerby. Then my eyes caught the posters featuring cigarette brands on the mini mart door. All of the sudden, pleasurable memories wafted over me. I could feel the cigarette between my fingers and taste the hot smoke. I was experiencing a smoking craving.

Getting sick raises questions and concerns for people in substance abuse recovery. As the leaves fall and the heaters turn on, colds, flus and other illnesses make the rounds. Personally, I am prone to developing sinus infections. Every time I come down with something, I have to consider what kinds of remedies are safe for me as a person in recovery. 

Early in recovery, a young woman who had gotten sober several years before me gave me some good advice. She said that when I felt like drinking, I should make a list of possible actions I could pursue and rank them in order from least destructive to most destructive. Actions such as praying or taking a bath would probably rank high on the list, while drinking and suicide would come in last. In the middle, I might list such things as shirking responsibilities to watch TV all day or going on a reasonable shopping spree. (I should mention, I have not struggled with shopping addiction.) When I felt the urge to drink or use, I was to start at the top of the list and work my way down.