One of my biggest regrets from my drinking days is that I wasn't a support for my grandfather when he was dying.  We were very close throughout my childhood and adolescence, but when he experienced a recurrence of cancer I was totally immersed in my alcoholism. My mother and I lived with my grandparents for some of his last months, but I was more harm than help. He died a few months before I got sober and for years, my wreaking havoc on my family during this difficult time pained me. For the last seven years I have experienced troubling recurring dreams involving my grandparents and their home, which was a happy and magical place for me growing up.

A few days ago a good friend of mine, Leah, asked for my opinion on a situation she was having with a friend of hers, Sarah. Leah was struggling to stay clean and sober, but recently, she recommitted to substance abuse recovery. Leah wanted to help her friend with a history of drug abuse, who is on methadone, so she has been driving Sarah to the methadone clinic three days a week. Unfortunately, Sarah recently started using drugs again and is pressuring Leah for drug contacts and even to drive her to drug deals. Leah decided she needed space from Sarah and asked if I thought seeking temporary distance was okay. My response -- of course! As long as Sarah is overwhelmed by her drug-seeking behavior, she is not capable of being a good friend.

Drug addiction affects people from all walks of life. It is, as the old saying goes, “not a respecter of persons.” Just as the ends of addiction are jails, institutions, and death, the opposite, recovery, can be a beacon of hope. But what can you do to help someone you know who is suffering from the ravages of substance abuse?

I have a good friend who has an expression that describes someone who you can truly trust.  He says that if we were to jump out of an airplane would we trust that person to “pull the rip cord.”  This is an interesting thought to ponder.

Co-Dependence is often the silent partner of the addictive relationship.  There are several characteristics of addiction including denial, compliance and control.  With the proper help, recovery is possible.

The holidays are a time of joy, celebration, family, friendships and spending time together, however throughout the month of December I always am asked for tips, or recommendations to help manage stress and stay present, mindful, healthy and sober. The holidays can be a huge stressor for many; there are parties, gifts to buy, family events, and sometimes it can all be too much.