Introduction to Becca Hargis, Author of ‘Dissociative Living’
My name is Becca Hargis, and I am greatly excited to join the Dissociative Living blog. I was first diagnosed in 1992 with dissociative identity disorder (DID), known then as multiple personality disorder; however, the stigma attached to the diagnosis made me run. I knew there was something not quite “right” about me, but I couldn’t accept that it was DID, so I fired my therapist. It took several more years and many more therapists, all of whom diagnosed me with DID, before I finally accepted it.
Becca Hargis Has Trouble Accepting Her Dissociative Identity Disorder
For years, it was difficult having the stigma of dissociative identity disorder with my accompanying headmates, known as “alters,” personalities, in tow. For a time, I never admitted my diagnosis to anyone except my husband. As is his nature, he was very accepting and supportive. Sometime later, I told my parents about my DID. They replied, “That explains a lot.” It made me realize how my disorder had affected other people and also how much I needed help.
Becca Hargis Becomes Open About Her Dissociative Identity Disorder
I am more open about having DID now. I accept I’m not crazy; I just have a unique way of dealing with life. Most people in my life do not know I have DID except for a few close friends and family. It is time, though, for the rest of the world to know I have DID, and there is no shame in the diagnosis or in us. We are not damaged goods. At one time, DID made me feel lonely, isolated, and stigmatized, but we are stronger than our symptoms and our disorder.
More About Becca Hargis and Where She Wants to Take the 'Dissociative Living' Blog
By means of this blog, and through our openness and honesty about our life with DID, we would like to help inspire you to know you are not without hope. With us, you are never alone. We gently put our hand in yours, and we will do together what we could not have done alone.
Hargis, B. (2018, February 9). Introduction to Becca Hargis, Author of ‘Dissociative Living’, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2023, January 28 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/dissociativeliving/2018/02/introduction-to-becca-hargis
Author: Becca Hargis
Hi I'm Anthony im 37 seperated and I have DID or aka multiple personality disorder... I'm so glad I found this write up! I was diagnosed 7 years ago after a very traumatic event happened I lost my little brother when he was only 16 and because of the rape and sexual abuse I suffered as a child it all came out as an adult after my little brother died.... iy set in the deep past trauma my life fell apart... after being a proud Toyota mechanic for many years and feeling like I wasn't a trauma victim at first I was diagnosed With Complex post traumatic stress disorder and borderline perspersonality disorder and now I have dissociative identity disorder or aka split personalities... the borderline personality disorder grew into the DID as I wasn't getting the correct treatment... I think what happened was the mood stabilizer they put me on was too low of a dose ...there was already the alter there growing n keeping silent then on days I have bad anxiety caused by stress that sets off the flashbacks with the past trauma then..... hello I meet my alter.... caused by severe stress and lack of medical intervention... he comes out n speaks to me he thinks he's my guardian and that I need him... he calls me weak and belittle me but I kinda see he just wants justice for me.... when he comes out with a lack of meds or too much stress there's literally two of me in the same body who are not the same at all... he wants revenge and to hurt people with violence but all I want is a peaceful loving life with people that matter to me to which he replys "I'm all you got and you know it.:" I kinda feel that way too like my life is so isolated and introvert now I'm scared as a man and who I call my old abused self is coming through to protect me in a really messed up way.... he wants me to stalk people and end their lives for what they done to me and other kids ... I'm scared il get in a rage and he will take over and go kill these people and I won't even be my fault I'm so so scared of that to the point I can't watch crime series on TV because I worry I will invoke him into me and IL go postal...... me the real me Is kind and giving and I'm loving and loyal, I'm just broken in life and I'm so glad I found this post... my whole life changed the day I was admitted to hospital for serious CPTSD I became fragmented and distant and I started doing things I wouldn't usually do .. but realizing it's not really you.... so hard to explain... I just want good friends and people to love me. The other me is vicious and dangerous and I don't like it. He said his name was Atom Ant? For unknown reasons I don't know to be honest...but anyway this bloody CPTSD and the DID has made me hypersexual and hyperaroused and when I get stressed out I lose myself to this Atom fella and I masturbate to try make him go away , but usually he takes over and masturbates me for hours until I'm sore then I wake up and find bad bad porn on my history on my device ....it's scary living with someone in your head you can't trust........ I was totally Normal before my brother died but I had a very extremely abusive childhood I was OK with it until my brother died.... that ruined me so much... I wish I was just me again.... now I have serious underweight problems and I get accused of things I haven't done and sometimes I feel like my alter has done things with out me knowing....Lol mental 😆 I'm really bloody lonely to be honest... I used to be such a popular nice upstanding man now people think I'm a psychopath.....I'm also scared that I might be a psychopath .... that's why I stay away and don't get I involved or make friends just incase they meet Atom Ant and they freak out ...... I try to hide him pin him down with meds.. the only medication that really works for me is Tamezepam and cannabis.. I'm retired at age 37.... now that's depressing on its own lol anyway I truly would like to make real friends o the same level to share our experiences with maybe make us all heal or get worse lol 😆 I'm located I'm New Zealand if that's any help 👍 feel free to message me I'm at Anthonyfairhall22@gmail.com would be good to band together and actually have friends that can understand each other on all levels.... that's what I'm missing is someone to understand me
This Disorder that is affecting many is very interesting. I don't know everything about the disorder but, I am listening. I do have a question are people living with this Disorder able to switch when someone tells them to?
You have waited quite a while for this reply. I hope it is helpful and timely in spite of that wait. I am myself learning about the condition for the sake of my dear wife, who is not yet diagnosed but shows textbook signs of DID.
What I have learned about switching on queue is that it is a "sometimes" thing. It depends on how well integrated the alters are and how good communication is within the system, how willing they are, and how safe they feel. I hope this helps. Usually, when DID is first acknowledged it may not be possible, but with time and therapy cooperation not previously even conceivable becomes habit.
It was nice to stumble accross your blog today. I first found out about my D.I.D. when one of my alters (the little) decided to "meet" my husband when we were still just dating. She talked to him for 3 nights in a row before he told me he met about her. Let me tell you, that was quite a shock. Honestly though, in the long run, after some rocky times it turned out to be the best thing she could have done for our system.
Hello, i found out about you from a link my partner sent me. Im very thrilled to hear that you have been able to cope with living with DID (as far as i know, ive only found out about you today). I was hoping that you could give advice to help my partner live with DID, as he struggles with it almost on the daily basis. You dont have to reply or reach out to me, but it would be nice. Thank you and good day/night.
Hey Becca I would really love to meet you and your husband. I love just south of Atlanta in Jackson. I won’t get in to detail but I will leave my email. I hope to hear from either you or your husband.
Live not love lol sorry
Thank you, Al, for your comment. That is very kind of you. I always love to hear from people. Regretfully, we will not be able to meet with you; however, I encourage you to keep on reading and commenting on my posts. I will have another one soon. Thank you so much for your interest. Take care.
Hi Becca. I was diagnosed in 1990 and run a successful international blog about DID. www.morgan6062.blog It is wonderful to see your video and know by looking at you that you truly want to help folks with DID, so do I. Thank you so much!
Thanks, Shirley. I've seen you around on Twitter. We might even be friends. I am not as familiar about your blog though, so I will definitely check it out. Thank you for your comment. I appreciate it.