See the Reality Behind the Marks You Make
When someone who self-harms makes a mark, they do it for a reason unlike anyone else’s. No one person talks or sees or thinks the same and, in truth, that is quite a positive thing. However, when it comes to negative thoughts and choices, those too are specific to that person and that person alone can only change it.
Every self-harm scar and mark is proof of hardship, but is also proof of survival. The scars should also tell the self-harmer that it is possible to move forward after the mark is made. Sometimes, it is important to stand back, look in the mirror and really see the scars scattered on your skin. Think about why they are there and if you could have stopped yourself from making them.
Many people don’t want to stop the act when in the moment. However, when you separate yourself from the pain and look at the marks, you may feel the sudden urge to really change your behaviors.
Some people see scars and instantly have the urge to self-harm. For those individuals, obviously it isn’t always a safe idea to really look at your body in this light. For many, scars are not attractive to them and are made not for the look, but for the reason behind it.
When you take the time to look at your body and see the scars, it can be a wake-up call to really end the behavior and seek out ways to stop.
Let Your Scars Make You to Stop Self-Harming
I recently went to check my bank account and realized that all of my bills, as well as the down payment for my new apartment, had been taken out at the same time. When it comes to money and numbers, I am absolutely clueless. When I saw this and tried to figure everything out, I instantly broke down and thought I’d gone completely broke. I didn’t realize until the next morning how much I had picked the bumps on my skin until I got out of the shower and looked in the mirror.
I do have small bumps that are actually real, not imagined, that I do pick (many know this and have read it before). I typically do it out of habit, but this time I knew it was out of stress and happening without thought. The marks made me flash back to the past when fresh cuts lined my arms. Just by seeing the marks from picking, and flashing back to that awful time in my life, I realized how awful my arms really look when I pick them.
I finally need to admit to myself that I might have excoriation disorder. The disorder is categorized under obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) because the picking is often done robotically and compulsively. In my eyes, it is self-harm and even though it has been six years since I last purposely cut, I need to stop picking because I do not want to see myself as being involved with self-harm again.
By stepping back and seeing the harm you have done to your body, you may finally see the negative behavior for what it is: a harmful, scarring addiction. Once you are able to admit to yourself that the actions need to end, you can work on finding ways to make it possible to do so.
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APA Reference
Aline, J.
(2014, September 9). See the Reality Behind the Marks You Make, HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, December 23 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2014/09/see-the-reality-behind-the-marks-you-make
Author: Jennifer Aline Graham
Hi I do This to My Breasts. Its really Helpful To read this. I been doing this since 2010. It really helps to see this. I dont want to Self Harm Sometimes it happens so Quick.