Everyday Objects Can Become Weapons for Self-Harmers
Self-harmers know that typical, everyday objects can be seen in an unsafe light. Some people may see a can tab as, well a can tab, while self-harmers see it as an escape. While people see a pen cap as being used to top a pen, those who self-injure may see it as a harmful tool.
Being that everyone’s brains are unique and different, very few understand the mind of those who self-harm. This rings true for mental illness in general – they are frightening diseases to understand. For those who don’t quite take the time to see through the blurred eyes of a self-harmer, they may not fully grasp why they see and do what they do.
The world is filled with everyday objects that can be seen as deadly weapons through the eyes of a cutter or a burner. Even dull objects can be easily morphed into something that can be used to puncture or cut skin. This is one of the reasons it is difficult for self-harmers to overcome their struggle. Being surrounded by triggers can be just as deadly as when the items are being used.
Typical Objects Can be Seen in an Unsafe Light
I recently moved into a new apartment after two stressful weeks of finding the perfect place. I began going through boxes and organizing my kitchen when a few mason jar covers fell out of the cupboard and onto the counter. When they fell, some of the sharp, circular centers came out of the top and when I went to pick them up, I stared at them for a moment.
I realized that six years before that very moment, I probably would have saved those sharp jar tops to use on my skin. I probably would have even made a self-harm mark at that very moment just out of pure curiosity. It was hard for me to push those covers into the back of the cupboard and to stop thinking about what “past me” would have done with them. I was also proud of how I was able to do just that – push the sharp objects away.
Some people come face-to-face with simple, everyday tools and are unable to just push those urges aside. A paperclip may be a paperclip one day and the next it is being used to hurt your body. For some people, it is hard to even use scissors or a razor without harmful memories hitting them in the face.
It takes time to be able to face those demons and stop self-harming without falling backwards and using them again for unsafe reasons. Some of us are able to push past those triggers, but still can’t fight the thoughts connected to them. It’s natural to connect certain thoughts with objects that connect you to your past. However, it is important to find the strength to push those negative thoughts aside before they become a battle once again.
Aline, J. (2014, August 29). Everyday Objects Can Become Weapons for Self-Harmers, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2023, October 4 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2014/08/everyday-objects-can-become-weapons-for-self-harmers
Author: Jennifer Aline Graham
Recently I have been finding it hard to think of a reason that I should live. My life isn't bad at all. I have a caring mum and an awesome sister but I just can't find a reason. I can't see myself as anything but dead in the future. I don't who I am or what I want to become. I never feel good enough and im always disappointing my friends. I have been cancelling plans and avioding seeing them. I dont rlly want to be friends with them anymore because i dont want them to be hurt or sad when im not alive. I just dont know how to tell them. I haven't been going to school recently because it drains me but ik that if I don't go then I won't get an education and I won't be able to have a good life. The kids at my school and some of my friends are a bit mean to me. Sometimes they make small comments about my face or me acne and they dont mean to hurt me (i think) but it still does. One of my closer friends "T" is also struggling. She currently lives an hour and 10mins away from me but today she hurt herself and honestly I have been thinking about doing the same for the past year. Last night I tried but I couldn't do it. There is nothing wrong with my life and I think that I am just being dramatic but I haven't told anyone anything about how I've been feeling so im just using this as an excuse to vent. Ik I'm only 12 and still have my whole life ahead of me but idk if I want to live it. The world is to cruel and horrible for me to live in.
Uh so I dont really know how to do this also considering my age... But I wanted to leave a reply because I'm sure others would understand.. So its so hard to think of what to say lets just talk about self harm because this is what the article is about so I've been self harming for 5 years and half the time I didn't even know and you could be like "how could you not know" well 5-6 years ago... (I was 5, I'm turning 11) I saw someone say there father was mentally abusive? I was abused since I was 3 because I wasn't "perfect" it was mostly verbally\mentally but it would turn physical at points so yeah I've been doing it for a while I would bite myself or use knives but they would just leave slight scratches and recently I've started choking myself til I almost faint and I have blades now so.. Yayy(can you hear the sarcasm?) I dereal or derealize myself? Not sure I might have eating disorder(s) and I've been depressed since I can remember I've had OCD and social anxiety as well along with ADD and I have been trying to stop because what if someone finds out? What if someone sees? You or sorry I don't know and I won't test it. I have 4 or so months to stop or else everyone will see and because of my eating disorder I literally never eat unless forced but because i rarely eat and the disorder I want to throw up afterwards or even the thought of food and liquids.. Just feels bad
this or writing this feels so weird so I'd like no judgement if that's okay?
-just some awkward girl with mental problems
i don’t really know how to start this but i’m also a awkward girl with mental problems, honestly not sure how i ended up on this website but i read your comment and i deeply relate to what your going through. i never want to eat anything even if i’m hungry i don’t have the energy or motivation to do simple things like clean my room. i wake up thinking about cutting or killing myself, i just don’t want to feel or be anything (not sure if that makes sense) i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i’m starting 11 grade soon and last year was really hard. this guy from my math class assaulted me during class and i didn’t even say anything to anyone. i hate myself for not standing up for myself and being so passive but idk maybe i deserved it. sorry for getting way off topic and ranting it just feels nice to write what i feel without feeling judged. anyway i hope things get better for you with your relationship with eating and cutting, it’s hard trust me i understand.
I constantly feel like I have to self harm, just to feel something. The fact that I am only 13 makes me feel worse. I came out as trans at 11, my original name continues to be used and it makes me feel terrible. I try to be open minded but it makes me feel, just confused. I wish I was different. I wish I could be good looking. Its crazy on how people can call themselves ugly and be so pretty. I can give people confidence but never give myself that same support. I just, I'm tired. I think I am going to give up soon. I probably just feel this way for attention but its eating me up. I don't want anyone to feel bad for me. I am just a girl who wishes she could be something different. Right? I feel like maybe I just want to be a guy to be different, maybe I'm not valid. Maybe I shouldn't exist, I wasn't meant to be here anyway. I'm surprised my mother even came back. I'm just so, empty all the time. I'm done. I'm just done.
For everyone out there who feels the same about anything I said, you are loved and please keep yourself safe and healthy. There are people who care. Sometimes you just have to wait for those people to come along.
Hi I'm Em and I've been self harming for over a year now. I'm 13. I lost my brother a few years ago, my dad was mentally abusive and I've been struggling with undiagnosed autism my whole life. I use a pair of tweezers to cut my arms and thighs. It's like a realise ig, a way to get it out. It feels like I'll never stop. I hate myself and I deserve it. It's an addiction so please anybody reading this article looking for ways to cut. Please don't, it only goes downhill.
I'm vince, about to be 15, I've been struggling with self harm for about a year now. I am trans male, and my mother is verbally abusive. whenever she makes some hurtful comment, I feel the desperate need to self harm. I guess it is my way of releasing frustration, I crave the feeling when I am stressed or frustrated. I also do it when I feel guilty about something. I guess its also a way of punishing myself. It makes me feel a little bit more valid as a person if I put myself through pain, I don't even know if that makes sense. I need to talk about it, but my mother won't allow me therapy, and it isn't the kind of thing you can just bring up to someone. I've relapsed, and I really don't know what to do or where to find help.
I'm 16, and have been self harming since I was I think 13-14. I still do, and it's really hard for me to get passed it, I used to use thumb tacks or stupid little things, but then one day I accidentally shattered a picture frame, and now I have so many pieces of the glass stored around me room. It's difficult for me to stop. I don't really know why I do it, but I just do. I sometimes do it just to see the blood, or to feel something. Sometimes I do it because I feel like I deserve to feel this way. I usually do it when I wake up for school in the morning, or I even do it at school. I found this article by searching up other items that can be used as self harm. I really am trying to stop, but it's so difficult. Nobody knows about how I feel. I just take low dosage Zoloft for my anxiety, and even that doesn't work. I'm sitting here typing this as the leg of my shorts is starting to become blood stained.
For the last few days I've been fighting the urge to self harm and the thing that kept me away from doing it today was bc all the good knives were in the dishwasher ( the other clean one have a "dull" edge idk but they don't cut very well ). I self harmed once and i want to do it again
Some trans 14 yo
I've been depressed since I was ten suicidal since 11 and started sh about six months ago (I am 12) I am undiagnosed but pretty sure i have depression and social anxiety. which makes it worse bc i feel like I have no reason to feel this way. my parents are probably mentally and verbally abusive but idk. I am basically raising my four siblings. I just want to die i stopped pretending to be happy and it tore my family apart even more.i used to go to therapy bc of me and my moms relationship but my mom doesn't let me go anymore bc i told them my dad hits me.which was apparently lying. My parent refuse to accept i might not be ok so they " diagnose" me with autism, ocd, adhd, something like defiance disorder. Even if i do have autism or adhd or something my parents can't diagnose me with that. Life has no point anymore at school my friends keep calling me emo and I hate it. Idk what to do anymore. My friend saw blood dripping under the bathroom stall and didn't even care.i wish i never existed and i really just don't know what to do. I almost don't want to feel better idk why. Hiding my sh scars is so hard i want to stop but also not.i feel like i have no friends bc my parents won't let me have even a flip phone and that's how all my friend communicate. I already have plans for suicide i just really need help please help me
Thank you so much for reaching out. It can be difficult to express that you need help, so this is a courageous and important step you've taken. I am so sorry to hear that you are hurting—I would encourage you to continue seeking out those who can offer you support, resources, and assistance. The HealthyPlace mental health referral page is an excellent place to access more information on organizations and confidential hotline numbers that might be useful to you. Here is a link to the page: https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/resources/mental-health-hotline-numbers-and-refer…. In the meantime, I know it's hard, but please keep reaching out.
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I've been dealing with severe depression for almost 5 years now. I'm 11 currently and it's my first year of middle school. A lot has happened since it started and I've lost a lot of people close to me. I self harmed a bit last year and started again this year. I cut my thigh with a sewing pin and have lost a lot of people who were dear to me because they didn't like that I self harmed. I've also had to deal with panic attacks, anxiety, and bullying. I feel worthless and don't know what to do anymore. A little while ago I started stashing my pills away in my room until I'm able to OD. My friend told me to throw them out but I can't bring myself to do it. What should I do?
don’t do it please, it’s not worth it. your friend will miss you when your gone, leaving is just being selfish and all of the pain you had will move onto them. you don’t know me but my name is jessivia and i love you. please stay. contact me if you need insta- jess_ivia
snap- jess_ivia tiktok- jess_ivia
Please please please don't save your pills in your room. i get how hard it can be to throw them away. you've been dealing with all of this for a while. 5 years. you're eleven. you've been dealing with severe depression since you were 6. i know what it's like losing friends because you self harm. i self harm too. from one self harmed to another: please don't OD. i'm 14, turning 15 this year. i'll be here for you. you can dm me on discord anytime you need. you are not worthless. i know it might sound really stupid and cheesy, but it's true. please feel open to reach out to the suicide hotline (988) anytime you need.
Hi, my name is Sofia. I've been struggling with self harm since I was 11. I am 13 now. I don't know how to stop, and I feel like I'm disapointing the one I worship (Aphrodite). I burn, cut, and hit myself. I don't even know why I do it anymore, I just do it when I'm bored at this point. It's an addiction like no other, and deserves to be treated as such.
I'm sorry you've been dealing with SH and all the difficult things that come with it. Quitting can be difficult, but it absolutely IS possible and worth the effort in the end. My first advice is usually to reach out to someone if you can; this comment was a good start. If there's any family or friend you can talk to about what you're going through, that's even better--even if you don't tell them you SH right away, just sharing some of your feelings and what you're struggling with can help a lot. Even better, if you can, would be to talk to a mental health specialist; you might try and see if your school has a free counseling program you could take advantage of. Again, even if you don't talk about the SH (which could get reported to your parents, FYI), talking through some of your feelings might be a way to crack open the door to healing.
Otherwise, I've written a bit about trying to heal on your own if you absolutely can't reach out to anyone at this time:
I hope that helps. I wish you the best and hope you are able to start healing soon. Take care.
hi im jersie and ive been battling sh for a year now and its been hard last few months to stop myself from just grabbing my blade and ripping my skin because my mum and new step dad arnt making it easier 2 months into there relationship and my mum is pregnant and they r engaged im hsppy for them tho im 5 months clean and i wont be doing it again because i have the best bouyfriend a girl could ask for but my life got a bit easier since i got rid of the toxic people and made lots and lots of new frinds and boyfriend we have been together 3 months today thx for reading.... jersie x
Thanks for your comment. I'm sorry things have been hard but I'm so glad you're healing and that you've got friends and a boyfriend to help support you even when things with your family are difficult. Five months clean is a huge achievement! I hope that number keeps rising, but know even relapse is just a bump in the road to recovery, not the end.
i am 15 years old and i self-harm it doesn't matter if my parents take away everything i'm still going to cut. I use anything at this point pencil sharpeners,tacs,pencils,led,pens,earrings,paperclips,erasers, maybe even my own fingernails at this stage don't get addicted i'm warning you.
I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling like this, though it's nice of you to try and use it as a means of deterring others from experiencing the same difficulties you have. Know that, no matter how desperate to hurt yourself you feel now, recovery IS possible. When you're ready, please check out this resource page—there are some hotlines and resources there that you may find helpful, if and when you choose to try and stop hurting yourself:
Know that you do not deserve to hurt like this. Know that you are worthy of healing. And know I am rooting for you, even when you feel like no one else is. You are not alone.
I have been cutting since i was 10 years old i am 13 now. I had always been a bit sad since i was a little kid, when i was 10 i got this idea that i would start cutting but that didn't work out i soon got addicted and my family found out.My parents have sent me to the mental hospital a lot and i have a bunch of unwanted scars, All i'm trying to say is don't self-harm you will get bullied, you will have scars, you will become addicted, and most importantly don't do it for attention or to fit in.Just be yourself.I am 2 weeks clean and i hope that you will listen and don't self-harm please it is not good i promise,and if you do self-harm ik it can be hard to stop but just don't become like me please.Live your life to it's fullest.<3 -Skylar
Thank you so much for your comment. I am so sorry for all of the things you went through, but it's lovely that you wanted to share all of that in the hopes of deterring others from self-harm and inspiring them to love themselves better. Two weeks clean is excellent; I hope that number continues to rise. And be sure to take your own advice and don't be hard on yourself; you deserve every bit of the compassion you're showing here for others. :)
i am cutting for 4 moths now..its terrible it gets worser and just want to attempt suicide...my friend i name her "S" gets trough alot of pain to..she wnats to attempt suicide to an has a bad eating disorder(me to btw) but she has shit parents they dont even care bout her my parents in that way are littlle bit nicer but idk what to do i am aslogoing trough pancick attacks and i have anxiety how can in help 'S' and myself? xxx, ash
I'm so sorry I didn't get back to you sooner. I hope that you are still here, and that you see this.
I know there is very little a stranger on the internet can say that will make things feel okay when you feel so low that you feel like you can't keep going anymore. But I am going to try my best, because I do want you and your friend 'S' to stay in this world and experience better things than what you have experienced lately. There IS beauty in this world and there ARE things worth living for, and often pain—even very deep pain, like you and your friend seem to be feeling—does pass, or at least abates for long enough to let us enjoy those good things worth fighting for.
I am not a mental health expert; please know that. But I do highly recommend working with one if you can; it can be so helpful to have someone in your corner who can really get to know you, your situation, and your specific needs for recovery. It may take some time to find the right one, so know if you don't hit it off with the first therapist you try, that doesn't necessarily mean therapy isn't for you.
However, I know that therapy isn't always an option, and if it's not for you or for your friend, the best thing you can do is to try and take care of yourselves—starting in the most basic ways. Are you eating regular, balanced meals? Are you sleeping enough? Are you showering regularly? I hope this doesn't sound patronizing; I've been to emotional places so low that even those things are difficult to do, and if you're in that sort of place, that's the best thing to start with. Just making sure that you are doing things for your mind and body that will help them cope with what's going on. Given that you both have eating disorders, I realize food is a serious concern here; this is another reason to try and reach out to a therapist, or even a regular doctor to start with, if you can. Simply ensuring your body has the right nutrients and the right amount of fuel (food) to survive on can play SUCH a major role in how we feel and our overall outlook on life.
It seems like you and your friend S can talk to each other about these things to some extent. That's great. But it's important to be able to talk to someone who is NOT feeling as low as you do right now, someone who can listen with empathy but also help you see beyond what you're going through and remind you that there IS hope and reasons to keep going. If not a professional, then someone you trust—a friend, a family member, even possibly a teacher or someone of that nature. There are also hotlines you can call where people will listen when you need a friendly ear and help connect you to resources that will help you feel better.
Please check out this page for some of those hotline numbers and resources:
I don't know what else to say except this: that I have had panic attacks too, and struggled with both anxiety and depression. And while I can't say I know exactly how you feel, because everybody has a unique experience of life and everything in it, I will say that I know what it feels like to feel like there's no point in going on, like life is nothing but pain and darkness.
But it's not; it just FEELS that way. I have lived long enough to walk through to the other side of those feelings and feel grateful that I am still here. I think you will be able to do the same. I hope so. Things can and do get better. I hope you stick around to watch that happen.
I am 13 I have 5 siblings and two parents that want to think im responsible for their kids well being. I try and try and cant seem to let the feeling go that i'll never be able to have a normal childhood. Ive been self harming since i was 7 and had 4 suicied attemts since them my parents only know about 1. Ive never been happy and my parents are just degrading me and telling me im just an ungrateful bitch, hopefuly soon ill be out of my misery.
It sounds like you feel a lot of pressure and generally overwhelmed by your situation, which sounds very stressful. I'm so sorry you've been put in a position where you feel so much weight on your shoulders. For what it's worth, I'm glad that you are still here, and that you took the opportunity to reach out via this comment for support. That's an excellent step in the right direction.
Does your school have a counseling program? If so, I would strongly urge you to speak to a counselor and talk to them about what is going on. A mental health professional can help you address a complicated situation like this and find ways to feel better without hurting yourself. I know that it might feel, at times, like there is no way out or that you have no hope of ever being happy, but please believe me when I say that's not true. It may take some time, but recovery IS possible and you CAN feel better. A counselor can also arrange for your parents to have important discussions about your mental health and how they can better support it—as well as that of your other siblings. In a worst-case scenario, a counselor can also help you and your siblings get out of your household if your living situation is, or becomes, abusive.
If there is not a counselor available at your school, or if you are not comfortable talking to them about your situation, you can also call or text a hotline, where someone can help you figure out what you can do to change your situation and improve your state of mind.
This page has an excellent list of hotlines and other resources you can turn to for help:
Above all, please do not give up on yourself or on your future. The only constant in life is change, and your circumstances CAN change for the better. Just keep in mind that you will likely need some help to make that happen, so please do reach out to a counselor or hotline as soon as possible. Please also feel free to comment again here or elsewhere on the blog if you have more questions or concerns you'd like to discuss.
I have been clean for about 4 years now! It does get better, I promise. Just hang in there because you deserve happiness and love and appreciation and you will get it sooner than you think. Until then, don't be afraid to ask for help.
We love you :)
I'm really just tired of life. My mom is verbally abusive, and even when she found out I've been trying to commit suicide, she doesn't care. My parents just dumped me in a mental hospital. They monitor everything I do, and I absolutely hate it. I overthink everything, have anger issues, and extreme anxiety disorder. Antidepressants don't work, and recently, I've started cutting my neck. I don't know why I'm typing this, I just want to get the pain out. If anyone has advice for me, please help. I'm just done with life.
Thank you for reaching out with your comment. I am so sorry to hear that you are in the midst of all this pain right now. I would encourage you to seek out resources that can help you take the steps toward healing. Please see HealthyPlace's list of hotline numbers and mental health interventions here: https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/resources/mental-health-hotline-numbers-and-refer…. In addition you might find our online Anxiety Community (https://www.healthyplace.com/anxiety-panic) and Self-Injury Community (https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/self-injury/self-injury-homepage) to be supportive as well. I know it can be difficult, but please reach out for help.
Me too love me too I'm in care and I'm so sick of moving every month and not trusting anyone
Me too love me too I'm in care and I'm so sick of moving every month and not trusting anyone
Me too love me too I'm in care and I'm so sick of moving every month and not trusting anyone
I got to the point of using a steak knife...
I am in a lot of pain, suicide attempts, self harm, pushing people away.
I cant take it anymore. I'm done, I'm tired and just want to have 2 seconds of peace..
except in my house you don't get that.
my older brother is DEAD my older sister is missing.
my little brother is in 7th grade at my school...
but even he can't keep me here anymore.
i've been fighting for too long.
I'm sorry, I'm done....
-an 8th grader
Thank you for reaching out. That takes courage, and I am so sorry to hear that you are in so much pain. HealthyPlace has a list of mental health resources and hotline numbers that you can find here: https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/resources/mental-health-hotline-numbers-and-refer…. In addition, our Self-Injury Community page has information and support for you too: https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/self-injury/self-injury-homepage. I know it can be difficult, but please consider seeking help.
HealthyPlace Comment Moderator
I really need help. I cant take this any longer. I feel beyond hope.
First, I'd like to tell you that I understand how you feel; I've felt it too, or at least something like it. When you're in a dark place, it can be incredibly hard to even remember what the light looks like, let alone believe that you'll ever feel it on your face again.
But the only constant in this life is change. Whatever is happening now won't always be happening. The feelings you're feeling now will not last forever. There is always hope; you don't have to feel it for it to be true.
I know it may not feel good to admit right now, but it's good that you acknowledge that you need help. That is the first step, and for many people, one of the hardest. The next step is finding help.
First, it sounds like you might need some support right now, to get through this moment. Please consider calling one of the hotlines on this page for help: https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/resources/mental-health-hotline-numbers-and-refer…
If you have anyone you already trust enough to talk to about this, please call or message them as well. I know it isn't easy to share this pain with others, but you've already taken a big step simply by commenting here. It's so important that you let the people you care about--and who care about you--do what they can to help, even if that just means listening and being with you until these feelings subside. If you already have a therapist, counselor, or another medical professional you can talk to, please contact them as well. If you don't, again, calling one of the hotlines listed on the page I linked to above can help you get connected with someone who can help you through this.
For less immediate support, there's also a lot of good information on this page about self-harm, including recovery tips that you can start using right now on your own: https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/self-injury/self-injury-homepage#self
Finally, remember that what you feel and what is true are not always the same thing. You may feel right now that you can't cope, and that you are beyond hope, but we humans are often far more resilient than we give ourselves credit for. Don't dwell on forever; it's too big, too overwhelming to take in all at once. Instead, focus on what you can do right now, today, to make things even a little better. Take things one step at a time, starting with getting the help you need--and deserve.
I wish you all the best, Laura, and I hope to hear from you again--or if not, I hope that the reason is that you found the help you needed. Please do not hesitate to comment again if you need more support or have any other thoughts or questions you'd like to share.
Last year, I struggled to find anything sharp enough to break skin. I tried using everything I could find, like a broken hanger and a pen. My suicide attempts were with charger chords and violin tuners. I never wanted to tell anyone because when my brother saw I got hand tremors sometimes, He told me to stop faking. He said people have actual problems and lying won’t make people care anymore about an stupid brat. I felt ashamed of myself. I wanted to dies so bad that when my parents weren’t home, I held a knife to my throat. I wanted to kill myself but I remembered my future. I could make someone else happy, but through death they would finally care. I would put them through a day of sadness. I cut my arm with the knife to remind me of that day. I am twelve years old. I want to change my gender when I am 18. I look up to my brother. He on the other hand, only looks down on me.
oh abigall we are so happy that you didn't leave this earth. You are WORTH it! you have so much to live for and beyond those dark thoughts you are more than you think, people love you, your family loves you, and if anything im here for you. keep going you can do it!
I am 13 and have been self harming since 10 and have had nervosa anorexia since 6. I have attempted many times and I am looking for more self harm tools. Self harm helps me not commit so if anyone has any ideas please let me know.
Hi, My name is Siarah and I'm 15. I have been cutting for the past year and I use Razors and what ever I can Find. I have tried hitting myself and burning but it does not feel as numbing. I have not cut for about 4 weeks but I did fail once and it broke my heart. I'm trying but its really hard. I have no Friends where I just moved and My family is not very supporting.. I normally cut when I'm mad or when I'm in pain because it hurts less when its physical pain not emotional pain. I wish I could wipe my scars away and pretend that none of this has ever happened. my younger sister asked me the other day why I had scars on my arm (She's 9) and I didn't know what to say to her. What should I say? how do I stop? its almost imposible to look at everything in the house without thinking about self harming. Please. help. me. I really want to stop.
I can't believe i'm writing this at school lol
If someone asked me what the main thought in my head would be going into middle school, I probably would have said getting good grades, or making good friends. I never thought I would have been trying to stop cutting myself.
I've been trying to be more open about it to my close friends, and they have been very supportive in trying to help me stop, so that's been pretty nice. It's been 4 days since I've cut myself, and it's not easy not doing it. This is just a horrible feeling and I hope I never have to go through this ever again.
First of all, I just want to say what an amazing thing you're doing, and how this kind of self-awareness and ability to be proactive will only serve you in your recovery. You sound like you have some great people around you for support and even though quitting isn't easy, I can tell you're going to be just fine. Even though it's not something you expected to deal with, I learned a lot from dealing with mine, and I'm sure you will too. Keep taking care of yourself, and your life will start to get bigger and bigger until it grows beyond the pain of what you're going through now.
Best of luck,
I used razers, to cut and i burned myself with a rubber band. Im still trying to recover.
Recovery is hard. I appreciate you taking the time and effort to visit this resources page for self-harm; it shows that you are being proactive about your recovery, even if you feel frustrated by what feels like a lack of progress.
There are no small steps to recovery. Every step brings you closer to a better life. I hope you take advantage of some of the other resources on our site, and I hope also that you have people in your life who can help you along the way.
Best of luck,
For me it was anything with and edge: razor, paper clips, glass, mechanical pencils, ect. Honestly it doesn't matter what you use, nor how big/deep it is. It's all self harm none-the-less. All that matters is if you find it in yourself to stop, because until then, no one can help you.
I agree that all of it is self-harm. If the impulse to self-harm is there, everything in the world becomes a tool in service of that impulse.
Seeking help to address the underlying issues is the best way to get out of that mental trap.
For me, it's knives.
I remember, for me, it was box cutters. I worked stocking shelves in a department store and frequently used them to open boxes. I also used them to hurt myself (among other things). I still have a little trouble using one, but thankfully I'm at a job now where I don't use one.
I honestly used anything I could get my hands on, at one point. When I was hospitalized I used the pushpins that had been stuck in the cork-boards behind our beds. When those got taken away, I hid forks and plastic knives in my nightstand. It seems silly looking back on it now.
I've gone about a year without cutting now. I had stopped for a while, about three years, but I've had minor slips in between. I still get urges occasionally, but I'm doing my best to fight them. Medication and therapy have helped a lot!
Self harm is just like taking a drink and drugs. It is all about control. When life gets to be overwhelming picking up XXXX allows that instant relief. I had been cut free for sometime until I found out that I had been cheated on. I was out of control-angry, hurt and betrayed. I walked right into the garage had several drinks and grabbed a razor blade and made several large cuts. The blood made me feel vindicated. It dripped and left a puddle. I had scars form on the underside of my left wrist. They are vividly visible and I feel the shame and guilt of that action. I know people see them and everyday feel that is my punishment. I have had no urge since. I have hope for my future and I have listed goals for myself. Some are just simple tasks and some are long term. I stay motivated by that. I also ask myself these 3 questions
Is my thinking based on fact?
Does my thinking help me achieve my goals?
Does my thinking help me feel the way I want to feel?