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Coping with BPD

Accepting responsibility for past mistakes in relationships can be tricky when you live with a mental illness like borderline personality disorder (BPD). Because of my tendency for black and white thinking, I spent a lot of time refusing to own up to my part in relationship failures.
Living with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be chaotic at the best of times, let alone while dealing with a global crisis. I've been living in Lima, Peru, since March. Peru was the hotspot of COVID-19 and had some of the world's strictest lockdown conditions.1 Paired with recent political instability, coping with my BPD symptoms has been more difficult than ever.
I live with borderline personality disorder (BPD), and for several years, every time I attended a yoga class I would cry. There was something about lying down on the floor beside other people and listening to the teacher's calm instructions that brought me to tears. At the end of each class during the relaxation poses, I would ache with enormous sadness. As the teacher told me to "let go" and "allow yourself to rest," huge grief would rise inside me like a tide. Lying still on the mat, I couldn't hold back my tears.
Is it really possible to soothe borderline personality disorder (BPD) with your senses? As an emotionally sensitive person and someone with a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, it is easy for my emotions to run wild. Only last week was I doubled over sobbing during a panic attack following a small mistake that I had made. My therapist has taught me how to use the senses to ground myself during such moments of panic, and overwhelming shame and sadness. Let me share some of the techniques I use with you. Before I begin, however, I want to acknowledge that not every sense will be available to every person or may need to be used in an individualized way.
Having a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be really challenging at times. Not only is it tough having intense emotions, difficulties with self-criticism and near-constant fear of abandonment, but the condition is still shrouded in misunderstandings and misrepresentation. I have found it beneficial to remind myself of the following four things and wanted to share them in case they help you.
Being emotionally sensitive is like going through life with open wounds. Something that might go unfelt by someone who isn’t emotionally sensitive could be felt deeply by someone who is very sensitive to emotions. For me, being emotionally sensitive means that I experience a vast spectrum of emotions and often feel each one very intensely.
Recently I moved house and although only one element of my life changed, I feel like everything is different. Although I've only moved two miles away, I feel a million miles away from where I once lived. I am very sensitive to change and so it's taking me a while for my brain to understand that only one aspect of my life is different, rather than all facets of it. Due to my borderline personality disorder (BPD) and emotional sensitivity, I'm working extra hard at looking after myself throughout this transition period. 
How can blogging help your mental health? Here's how it's helped mine.
Suicidal thoughts are a huge part of my life with borderline personality disorder. Even though I have them less frequently than I used to, they can still cause me a lot of distress. Here are my four tips for managing suicidal thoughts.
Going on vacation with borderline personality disorder can bring added challenges. A few years ago, when I was on vacation with my friend in France, I found myself crying on the bathroom floor in the middle of the night becoming increasingly distressed and desperate to be at home. I love going on vacation and being lucky enough to explore new places, but there are times when going away causes me additional challenges for managing my borderline personality disorder (BPD).