Living with DID During the COVID-19 Outbreak

Coronavirus (COVID-19) is affecting my dissociative identity disorder (DID) symptoms. Living with DID means experiencing a wide array of different symptoms, ranging from anxiety to depression. Environmental factors can trigger these symptoms in my various personalities, depending on their particular trauma. Unfortunately, the COVID-19 outbreak has been a catalyst for a series of emotions I’ve been experiencing as of late.

COVID-19 began sweeping across the U.S. in early 2020. As a news junkie, I followed updates on the virus closely, but it didn’t occur to me that I may be susceptible to contracting the illness until I started seeing reports of it close to home. Living in a large, densely-packed city, my mind started to wander with thoughts of how I may catch COVID-19 by simply going about my daily routine. Activities as little as riding the subway suddenly became terrifying to my personalities, and it became so extreme that I no longer wanted to touch the packages delivered to my apartment.

Then came the self-quarantine.

Staying home seemed simple enough, on behalf of the recommendations from my state governor and city mayor. However, it instantly sent my extroverted personalities into a tailspin, leaving them wondering what they were going to do with themselves over the course of weeks indoors. This resulted in several panic attacks, leaving me both physically and mentally exhausted. Fast forward to today, and my daily routine looks much different than it did just two weeks ago.

Adjusting to Life with DID in the COVID-19 Era

Identifying the triggers of my personalities has been difficult, yet critical, in my attempt to get a hold of my mental health amidst this global crisis. Understanding exactly why I’m having bouts of anxiety and depression is essential to not only preventing panic attacks but avoiding triggers, whether they be daily news reports or my favorite podcast.

Medications have also provided immense relief in this trying time. I am fortunate enough to have a medication that was specifically prescribed to help me in moments of panic. While it doesn’t entirely eliminate my symptoms, it gives me a few minutes to breathe, collect my thoughts, and think of my next move.

Finally, meditation has filled in the remaining gaps in ways that I never could have imagined. Unfortunately, throughout the COVID-19 outbreak, I have experienced a rise in trauma nightmares. Meditation seems to be the only tactic that has allowed me to breathe out negativity and clear my mind enough to get some sleep.

Of course, these solutions won’t necessarily serve everyone with DID, which highlights the importance of finding out what works for you. Consider speaking to a medical professional to learn more about how to manage your symptoms during this difficult time.

How are you dealing with your DID and COVID-19? Share your thoughts in the comments.