It is generally believed now that there is a strong genetic connection of ADD and ADHD in families. Therefore, if one or more children are diagnosed in a family, then there is a good chance that at least one of the parents will exhibit symptoms also. With this connection in evidence it is inevitable that many adults (with ADD or ADHD) will find themselves raising a child who also suffers. Many of these ADD parents raising ADD kids were themselves brought up by one or more ADD parents! These grandparents and parents would more than likely have been undiagnosed and therefore treated.

Awareness of ADD and ADHD is only in the early stages, so for many children in Britain today, getting help and/or treatment is still a lottery. Unfortunately for us, because of the way ADD is perceived, many of our professionals are not yet taking on board that the cycle goes in both directions. It has been shown that ADD families have higher divorce rates, many ADD and ADHD children have been adopted, rates for domestic violence are higher, many of these children are taken into care for either abuse or perceived abuse and so on, so considering this long line of untreated ADD running through families, is it any wonder that many parents have difficulties?

So what can we do to improve things? First of all realize how our ADD affects our way of parenting. We know that these children do best in a structured environment .... which is totally the opposite to the way many of us live! This lack of structure does nothing to help the child who needs to know what he is supposed to be doing at all times. What an ADD adult may well regard as spontaneity, an ADD child may interpret as uncertainty or unpredictability. What about our impulsive natures? Do we often over react just like our children? Think about it. Perhaps your child may feel that he or she cannot depend on you for firm boundaries and consistent support.

Our ADD kids needs structure, structure and more structure, masses of support and a stable environment. Without these, they are being set up to fail, regardless of any medication they might be taking. The unfortunate thing is, that ADD adults often have difficulty providing this type of environment. How can we therefore parent these children in a more effective way? Well, for a start it is important to remember that the parent is the parent and the child is the child. As the adult in the relationship the responsibility must be with us at all times. We must keep control of situations, have the confidence to make (and enforce) rules and have the final say in discussion. Difficult I know - my son would argue the hind legs off a donkey. What often confuses issues is the fact that many situations which cause us difficulty as parents, are brought about by the child's reaction to something we have done and this unfortunately can turn some issues into chicken and egg situations which can escalate and escalate into total chaos and anarchy if the brakes aren't applied somewhere. This has to be our job, bearing in mind an understanding of our own possible ADD.

It often helps to reflect on what has worked and what hasn't in the past. Does shouting and screaming at an already wound up ADHD child really work? It is true, we may yell because we were yelled at as children, or we may have been driven to near distraction by the child's antics on a particular day, or because it is in our temperamental make up too. But if it has little or no effect on the child why continue to yell?

Sometimes, adding humor to a situation helps. I am confident enough by now, through knowing all about ADHD and by being able to understand how my son ticks, to turn difficult situations into jokes. Yes it is frustrating when your 12 year old sprinkles talcum all over YOUR bedroom floor, but getting him to vacuum it up (even after extended tantrumming) saying "This will stand you in good stead for when you get your own place son" wink, wink will make you feel better and also make him feel not as bad about his behavior.

So, simply put, often all that is needed is the belief in your own methods and the confidence to carry things out. This can be very difficult, especially if your parenting skills have been brought into question at any time, and your personality is such that you behave rather as your child does at times! But remember, parents of ADD and ADHD children do a more than excellent job under extremely difficult circumstances. Added to this may be the knock-on effects of their own ADD.

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Often parents have a difficult time getting an answer as to what is causing their children's inexplicable behavior. Over time, they may visit pediatricians, psychiatrists, clinical and educational psychologists and general practitioners. In many cases, parents find out through their own research, as I did, what is ailing their children. This is not the end of the road, however. Often it is the start of a new one. After all that, parents then have the difficult task of getting a firm diagnosis for their children.

Children who have displayed challenging behavior from a very young age could be suffering from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). On the other hand, it's important to keep in mind, your child may have a different disorder, for example, Asperger Syndrome, Conduct Disorder or Dyslexia. In any case, in order for these children to get the most appropriate medical, educational and managerial accommodations possible, they need some sort of diagnosis.

Here though, highlights the issue of whether or not to 'label' children who suffer from this range of childhood conditions. During my time manning the ADHD support group telephone helpline, I repeatedly encountered the frustration of parents whose children were left in diagnostic limbo, so to speak. Here in Britain, this was evident on a large scale.

Many was the time a parent would say to me that their specialist didn't want to 'put a label' on what was ailing their child (ren). Although one can see that labeling could bring into effect self-fulfilling prophesy in some cases, surely children who are obviously ill or disordered NEED a label (or diagnosis) to give a framework to the outside world of what would be expected of them.

Personally, I have had to fight tooth and nail to get 'labels' for my child. To have my child diagnosed the first time, I had to travel outside my community. However after coming back under the same authority recently, I have again had to cause waves to get in writing that my son also has Asperger syndrome (high-functioning autism). My specialists, in turn, have gotten frustrated with me because I HAVE to know what is the matter with my son, but I say this:

• Without a proper 'reason' for a child's difficulties, a parent cannot go through the necessary grieving process enabling them to come to terms and go forward.
• Diagnosed children get far more educational, medical and social accommodations that they are entitled to, than the child who does not have this so-called 'label'.
• Children without diagnoses, or with wrong ones, simply do not have their educational or medical assistance tailored exactly to their needs. What use is it for a child with Aspergers, whose most profound difficulty may be in comprehending everyday social situations, to have a statement of special needs which focuses mainly on his handwriting difficulties, when the help which is available would be much better utilized addressing the most acute presenting problems.
• A parent needs to KNOW, in order to move on. In simple terms, once a diagnosis has been made the parent can then educate him or herself all about the condition in question and how best to deal with situations which arise.

British professionals must somehow be made to see how this 'label' moves a situation on. In many other countries parents don't have this difficulty. Here parents often wait many, many years for such a label, which never comes. These are the parents whose children are excluded from school, who have dropped out of school because of underachievement, who are depressed, maybe unemployed, possibly abusing alcohol or substances...or even dead. So please, all you British professionals out there, never be afraid to label a child. You might just save their life.

So, what should a parent do if they are having difficulty getting a firm diagnosis? Well here are a few suggestions which might just help when you next see a specialist:

1. Go along and make it quite clear that you feel your child is suffering from ADD or ADHD. Try to get documentary evidence from school, in the form of report cards, behavior tick charts or letters, etc. If you have school reports outlining the particular difficulties, all the better.

2. If possible try to fill in a diagnostic criteria before you attend the appointment, otherwise you are wasting time. (Time your child hasn't got to waste). If you have any books or information leaflets referring to the behaviors your child shows, highlight them with a felt pen, and be insistent.

3. Make sure your specialist knows about these kinds of disorders. You need to be seeing a pediatrician or possibly a psychiatrist for initial diagnosis. It is no good if you have to wait months for your appointment if your child is going to be assessed by a drama therapist or practice nurse! (It does happen!) Before you agree to an appointment with this person find out what experience they have in ADD or ADHD. Ask which diagnostic tools they will be using.

4. If the secretary, or even the practitioner hasn't a clue what you are talking about, ask to be referred to someone who does. Be insistent. Also ask whether they are prepared to prescribe appropriate stimulant (or other appropriate) medication. Again, if not, ask to be referred to an experienced pediatrician who will. If they do not know of anyone to refer you to, ring your local Support Group who will be able to tell you the name of your nearest ADHD specialist.

5. Then, tell who you would have been seeing that you will be writing a letter to the health trust (or local medical board) voicing your concern about their lack of knowledge in dealing with the problem of ADD.

6. If you do get to see someone who does know a bit about ADD and ADHD, but who is reluctant to diagnose either way, ask IN WRITING why they think your child DOES NOT fulfill the criteria for ADD/ADHD.

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Teachers know what many professionals do not: that there is no one syndrome of ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) but many; that ADD rarely occurs in "pure" form by itself, but rather it usually shows up entangled with several other problems such as learning disabilities or mood problems; that the face of ADD changes with the weather, inconstant and unpredictable; and that the treatment for ADD, despite what may be serenely elucidated in various texts, remains a task of hard work and devotion. There is no easy solution for the management of ADD in the classroom, or at home for that matter. after all is said and done, the effectiveness of any treatment for this disorder at school depends upon the knowledge and persistence of the school and the individual teacher.

Here are a few tips on the school management of the child with ADD. The following suggestions are intended for teachers in the classroom, teachers of children of all ages. Some suggestions will be obviously more appropriate for younger children, others for older, but the unifying themes of structure, education, and encouragement pertain to all.

1. First of all, make sure what you are dealing with really is ADD. It is definitely not up to the teacher to diagnose ADD,. but you can and should raise questions. Specifically, make sure someone has tested the child's hearing and vision recently, and make sure other medical problems have been ruled out. Make sure an adequate evaluation has been done. Keep questioning until you are convinced. The responsibility for seeing to all of this is the parents, not the teacher's but the teacher can support the process.

2. Second, build your support. Being a teacher in a classroom where there are two or three kids with ADD can be extremely tiring. Make sure you have the support of the school and the parents. Make sure there is a knowledgeable person with whom you can consult when you have a problem (learning specialist, child psychiatrist, social worker, school psychologist, pediatrician - the person's degree doesn't really matter. What matters is that he or she knows lots about ADD, has seen lots of kids with ADD, knows his or her way around a classroom, and can speak plainly.) Make sure the parents are working with you. Make sure your colleagues can help you out.

3. Third, know your limits. Don't be afraid to ask for help. You, as a teacher, cannot be expected to be an expert on ADD. You should feel comfortable in asking for help when you feel you need it.

4. ASK THE CHILD WHAT WILL HELP. These kids are often very intuitive. They can tell you how they can learn best if you ask them. They are often too embarrassed to volunteer the information because it can be rather eccentric. But try to sit down with the child individually and ask how he or she learns best. By far the best "expert" on the how the child learns best is the child himself or herself. It is amazing how often their opinions are ignored or not asked for. In addition, especially with older kids, make sure the child understands what ADD is. This will help both of you a lot.

Having taken 1 - 4 into account, try the following:

1. Remember that ADD kids need structure. They need their environment to structure externally what they can't structure internally on their own. Make lists. Children with ADD benefit greatly from having a table or list to refer back to when they get lost in what they're doing. They need reminders. They need previews. They need repetition. They need direction. They need limits. They need structure.
2. REMEMBER THE EMOTIONAL PART OF LEARNING. These children need special help in finding enjoyment in the classroom, mastery instead of failure and frustration, excitement instead of boredom or fear. It is essential to pay attention to the emotions involved in the learning process.
3. Post rules. Have them written down and in full view. The children will be reassured by knowing what is expected of them.
4. Repeat directions. Write down directions. Speak directions. Repeat directions. People with ADD need to hear things more than once.
5. Make frequent eye contact. You can "bring back" an ADD child with eye contact. Do it often. A glance can retrieve a child from a daydream or give permission to ask a question or just give silent reassurance.
6. Seat the ADD child near your desk or wherever you are most of the time. This helps stave off the drifting away that so bedevils these children.
7. Set limits, boundaries. This is containing and soothing, not punitive. Do it consistently, predictably, promptly, and plainly. DON'T get into complicated, lawyer-like discussions of fairness. These long discussions are just a diversion. Take charge.
8. Have as predictable a schedule as possible. Post it on the blackboard or the child's desk. Refer to it often. If you are going to vary it, as most interesting teachers do, give lots of warning and preparation. Transitions and unannounced changes are very difficult for these children. They become discombobulated around them. Take special care to prepare for transitions will in advance. Announce what is going to happen, then give repeat warnings as the time approaches.
9. Try to help the kids make their own schedules for after school in an effort to avoid one of the hallmarks of ADD: procrastination.
10. Eliminate or reduce frequency of times tests. There is no great educational value to timed tests, and they definitely do not allow many children with ADD to show what they know.
11. Allow for escape valve outlets such as leaving class for a moment. If this can be built into the rules of the classroom, it will allow the child to leave the room rather than "lose it," and in so doing begin to learn important tools of self-observation and self-modulation.
12. Go for quality rather than quantity of homework. Children with ADD often need a reduced load. As long as they are learning the concepts, they should be allowed this. They will put in the same amount of study time, just not bet buried under more than they can handle.
13. Monitor progress often. Children with ADD benefit greatly from frequent feedback. it helps keep them on track, lets them know what is expected of them and if they are meeting their goals, and can be very encouraging.

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1. Break down large tasks into small tasks. This is one of the most crucial of all teaching techniques for children with ADD. Large tasks quickly overwhelm the child and he recoils with an emotional "I'll-NEVER-be-able-to-do-THAT" kind of response. By breaking the task down into manageable parts, each component looking small enough to be do-able, the child can sidestep the emotion of being overwhelmed. In general, these kids can do a lot more than they think they can. By breaking tasks down, the teacher can let the child prove this to himself or herself. With small children this can be extremely helpful in avoiding tantrums born of anticipatory frustration. And with older children it can help them avoid the defeatist attitude that so often gets in their way. And it helps in many other ways, too. You should do it all the time.
2. Let yourself be playful, have fun, be unconventional, be flamboyant. Introduce novelty into the day. People with ADD love novelty. They respond to it with enthusiasm. It helps keep attention - the kids' attention and yours as well. These children are full of life - they love to play. And above all they hate being bored. So much of their "treatment" involves boring stuff like structure, schedules, lists, and rules, you want to show them that those things do not have to go hand in hand with being a boring person, a boring teacher, or running a boring classroom. Every once in a while, if you can let yourself be a little bit silly, that will help a lot.
3. Still gain, watch out for overstimulation. Like a pot on the fire, ADD can boil over. You need to be able to reduce the heat in a hurry. The best way of dealing with chaos in the classroom is to prevent it in the first place.
4. Seek out and underscore success as much as possible. These kids live with so much failure, they need all the positive handling they can get. This point cannot be overemphasized: these children need and benefit from praise. They love encouragement. They drink it up and grow from it. And without it, they shrink and wither. Often the most devastating aspect of ADD is not the AD itself, but the secondary damage done to self-esteem. So water these children well with encouragement and praise.
5. Memory is often a problem with these kids. Teach them little tricks like mnemonics, flashcards, etc. They often have problems with what Mel Levine calls "active working memory", the space available on your minds table, so to speak. Any little tricks you can devise - cues, rhymes, codes and the like- can help a great deal to enhance memory.
6. Use outlines. Teach outlining. Teach underlining. These techniques do not come easily to children with ADD, but once they learn them the techniques can help a great deal in that they structure and shape what is being learned as it is being learned. This helps give the child a sense of mastery DURING THE LEARNING PROCESS, when he or she needs it most, rather than the dim sense of futility that is so often the defining emotion of these kids' learning process.
7. Announce what you are going to say before you say it. Say it. Then say what you have said. Since many ADD children learn better visually than by voice, if you can write what you're going to say as well as say it, that can be most helpful. This kind of structuring glues the ideas in place.
8. Simplify instructions. Simplify choices. Simplify scheduling. The simpler the verbiage the more likely it will be comprehended. And use colorful language. Like color coding, colorful language keeps attention.
9. Use feedback that helps the child become self-observant. Children with ADD tend to be poor self-observers. They often have no idea how they come across or how they have been behaving. Try to give them this information in a constructive way. Ask questions like, "Do you know what you just did?" or "How do you think you might have said that differently?" or "Why do you think that other girl looked sad when you said what you said?" Ask questions that promote self-observation.
10. Make expectations explicit.
11. A point system is a possibility as part of behavioral modification or reward system for younger children. Children with ADD respond well to rewards and incentives. Many are little entrepreneurs.
12. If the child seems has trouble reading social cues - body language, tone of voice, timing and the like - try discreetly to offer specific and explicit advice as a sort of social coaching. For example, say, "Before I tell your story, ask to hear the other person's first," or, "Look at the other person when he's talking." Many children with ADD are viewed as indifferent or selfish, when in fact they just haven't learned how to interact. This skill does not come naturally to all children, but it can be taught or coached.
13. Teach test-taking skills.
14. Make a game out of things. Motivation improves ADD.
15. Separate pairs and trios, whole clusters even, that don't do well together. You might have to try many arrangements.
16. Pay attention to connectedness. These kids need to feel engaged, connected. As long as they are engaged, they will feel motivated and be less likely to tune out.
17. Try a home-to-school home notebook. This can really help with the day-to-day parent-teacher communication and avoid the crisis meetings. It also helps with the frequent feedback these kids need.
18. Try to use daily progress reports.
19. Encourage and structure for self-reporting, self-monitoring. Brief exchanges at the end of class can help with this. Consider also timers, buzzers, etc.
20. Prepare for unstructured time. These kids need to know in advance what is going to happen so they can prepare for it internally. If the are suddenly given unstructured time, it can be over-stimulating.
21. Prepare for unstructured time. These kids need to know in advance what is going to happen so they can prepare for it internally. If they suddenly are given unstructured time, it can be over-stimulating.
22. Praise, stroke, approve, encourage, nourish.
23. With older kids, have then write little notes to themselves to remind them of their questions. In essence, they take notes not only on what is being said to them, but what they are thinking as well. This will help them listen better.
24. Handwriting is difficult for many of these children. Consider developing alternatives. Learn how to use a keyboard. Dictate. Give tests orally.
25. Be like the conductor of a symphony. Get the orchestra's attention before beginning (You may use silence, or the tapping of your baton to do this.) Keep the class "in time" , pointing to different parts of the room as you need their help.
26. When possible, arrange for student to have a "study buddy" in each subject, with phone number (adapted from Gary Smith).
27. Explain and normalize the treatment the child receives to avoid stigma.
28. Meet with parents often. Avoid pattern of just meeting around problems or crises.

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1. Encourage reading aloud at home. Read aloud in class as much as possible. Use story-telling. Help the child built the skill of staying on one topic.
2. Repeat, repeat, repeat.
3. Exercise. One of the best treatments for ADD in both children and adults, is exercise, preferably vigorous exercise. Exercise helps work off excess energy, it helps focus attention, it stimulates certain hormones and neurochemicals that are beneficial, and it is fun. Make sure the exercise IS fun, so the child will continue to do it for the rest of his or her life.
4. With older children, stress preparation prior to coming into class. The better idea the child has of what will be discussed on any given day, the more likely the material will be mastered in class.
5. Always be on the lookout for sparking moments. These kids are far more talented and gifted than they often seem. They are full of creativity, play, spontaneity, and good cheer. They tend to be resilient, always bouncing back. They tend to be generous of spirit, and glad to help out. They usually have a "special something" that enhances whatever setting they're in. Remember, there is a melody inside that cacophony, a symphony yet to be written.

This article was among those given to GRADDA by Drs. Ned Hallowell and John Ratey as they were writing their now-published book, Driven To Distraction. They often appear on television, radio and at ADD conferences across the country. Dr. Ned was in Rochester as our Annual Conference speaker in 1994. Ed Note: In response to questions about developing different or separate teaching techniques for ADD children, Drs. Hallowell and Ratey note that the suggestions they've made serve ALL students although they are especially helpful for those with ADD. They do not support creation of "separate" approaches.

Thanks to Dick Smith of GRADDA and the authors for permission to reproduce this article.

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Is your family always the one at the restaurant whose little darling opens the salt shaker, spills the ketchup and trips the waiter, embarrassing you to the point that you would prefer to undergo root canal without anesthesia rather than be there? Does your tyke purposely pull out the bottom box of cereal in a supermarket display, causing you such intense embarrassment that you truly wish you could disappear? Is your precious dear always saying "NO!" to you, seemingly just to watch the color of your face change as you become increasingly enraged? Read on for some helpful information and hints.

Often, a parent contacts me frantic and exasperated. "Jill just seems to do the opposite of everything I say," or "Chris never listens. He pretends that he doesn't hear me and then does what he wants," they say. To my understanding, a "challenging" or "difficult" child is one who consistently fails to respond to or initiate an appropriately requested behavior within a few moments. While these children's behavior can indeed be difficult to deal with, it's important to keep in mind that it is the behavior and not the child, that needs to be changed. In many cases it is the parents' behavior that needs adjusting, for typically such behavioral problems arise as a result of less than ideal interactions between parent & child from an early age.

Let's take a look at what non-compliance means to different age groups. In young children (up to 10 years old), non-compliance is a way in which the child attempts to delimit interpersonal boundaries. In other words, the child is seeking to establish a sense of self as separate from those around him or her, especially the parents. What is most important is that the child perceive support for those independence-related behaviors that are appropriate. In addition, young children are testing the limits of their personal power to control their world. This is perfectly appropriate; it, too, is vital in the development of adequate self-esteem and sense of confidence.

For those older than 10 (and especially those pesky teenagers), the child begins to challenge authority, which is appropriate and further aids in the development of self identity and direction for the future. This is why teenagers may suddenly become vegetarians, become politically active, often in direct opposition to their parents' beliefs, and listen to "awful" music (unlike those of their parents who grew up listening to classical music, such as the Beatles, Rolling Stones and Led Zeppelin). What an adolescent requires is the reassurance, often implicit, that he or she will be loved no matter what their taste in music, clothes or boyfriends. Thus, non-compliance is often related to important life-stage issues that are critical to the development of personality and self-esteem. Often what appears "difficult" is actually a child's appropriate attempts at self- expression and learning. To reiterate, what is troublesome is not the child, but his or her behavior pattern, which becomes consistent.

Unfortunately, today's overworked parents often take little notice of positive behavior and instead only react when their child misbehaves. This sends a message that in order to be heard or acknowledged, children must do something negative in order to get their parent's attention. In addition, assuming that the developmental tasks described above are taking place, the child may be getting the wrong message -- that it is not acceptable to strive for independence, to test authority, to take risks. Also common is (in my opinion) the mistaken belief that punishment works, even when a child behaves age appropriately (though to his or her parent's dislike).

There are, of course, many ways to deal with behavior that appears troublesome. Parents may use intimidation, such as saying "Boy! Are you going to get it when your mother gets home!" or "You'd better do it, or Mommy won't love you anymore." Clearly these types of responses threaten the child's sense of self-esteem and even safety, if threats of physical intimidation or abuse are used.

Another common negative type of control is the use of guilt to coerce the child to do what the parent wants. Responses such as "I stayed up until three o'clock in the morning and this is the thanks I get?" or "You're driving me to an early grave," and my personal favorite "I carried you under my heart for nine months and this is how you treat me?" Such techniques of behavioral control teach the child manipulation and how to get what they want without taking responsibility and without regard to others' feelings.

On the other hand, an assertive but positive response by his or her parent teaches the child how to take responsibility for their own wishes while respecting other people. Statements such as "I realize that you'd like to go out and play without a coat, but it's cold outside and I want you to put one on" or I know that you'd like to stay up late tonight, but we agreed last week that 8 o'clock is your bedtime" demonstrate a variety of appropriate communication skills, such as taking responsibility for your own feelings ("I" statements) as well as disagreeing with other people without being disrespectful. In general such statements imply self-worth and bolster self-esteem, even though the child may be angry at the time.

Here are some other tips to help a parent take charge positively when their child becomes "challenging:"

• Use consequences - Consequences, positive as well as negative, should be discussed at a time when everyone is calm and be applied appropriately and immediately after your child exhibits particular behaviors.
• Use positive statements as often as possible.
• Use praise and encouragement as much as possible.
• Avoid labeling, comparisons and bullying.
• Ignore negative behavior as much as possible.
• Deny - Just say "NO" when your child demands something unreasonable, and stick to it.
• Demand - Insist, and say "Please DO THIS" when something of benefit to the child or others is necessary.
• Delegate - Communicate that it's alright for your child to assume greater freedom for his or her own life, but appropriately for their age and subject to parental discretion. Teach the child that along with greater freedom, which you are prepared to give, come greater responsibilities and consequences for their actions, both positive and negative.
• Encourage choices - Offer your child several choices, any of which is acceptable to you.
• Be consistent - Always follow through once you have made a decision and told your child. Successful and consistent follow-through communicates to your child that you are firmly and lovingly in control, reassuring him or her.

There are many more ways in which to you can change your child's troublesome behaviors into positive ones. In more troublesome cases, parents may need to contact a Psychologist. Above all respect, love and positive regard are the most important aspects in any relationship, particularly between parent and child. Allow your "challenging" child to be himself or herself and with some guidance they won't be "challenging" at all.

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Do you know what services your ADHD child is eligible for from the school district? You should!

Did you know that your child is eligible for services from the school district from birth? Did you know that you do not have to wait for a teacher or education professional to request special education testing and that you can request them yourself ?

Did you know that the school is responsible for providing services and accommodations to your ADHD child, even if they have to pay for them out-of-pocket? Did you know that laws state that schools can not use budget excuses as reasons not to provide services or accommodate your child's education?

You should know all of this and more! And you can have all of this information at your fingertips. Many local Protection (Social Services) and Advocacy agencies have manuals listing all this information and more.

CHADD has booklets available telling you about your rights and there are several places, right on the internet, where you can either purchase manuals detailing your rights or find most of that information for free! Make sure that any manuals or books you purchase are up-to- date, published in 2004 or later, to ensure that they include the latest updates to IDEA 2004 (Individuals with Disabilities Education Act).

The manual that I use, Special Education Rights and Responsibilities, is available at no charge right here on the net. You can read about the changes in IDEA 2004 and what they mean to ADHD children.

If your child doesn't qualify for special education, he/she still qualifies for services and accommodations under Section 504. Be sure you ask that a Section 504 representative for your district attends the IEP meeting in case you need to seek services under Section 504. For more information on Section 504 visit Council of Educators for Students with Disabilities.

Other sources I recommend to look for information would be:

• How to be an Advocate for your child.
• Wrightslaw: An excellent source of legal and education material regarding special education issues.
• Questions Dealing with IEP's

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An excuse for bad parenting

How many times in the course of trying to get help for our children do we come up against this old chestnut? Often, from the very people we have gone to for help!

In actual fact, parents of ADHD children are usually BETTER parents because of all the difficulties they have had to overcome. Our children challenge more rules, overstep more boundaries, get into more trouble at school than the average kid.

Many times though, it's not the challenging behavior which causes the greatest issues for us, it's the knock-on effects of the behavior. For example, having to go into school repeatedly to apologize for the child's difficulties, trouble with neighbors who sometimes just have these children down as 'bad uns.' Having psychologists and psychiatrists who we have gone to for help, doubt our word and listen, but not hear and understand what we tell them.

If bad parenting causes ADHD, what then accounts for the fact that often there are other children in the same family who are perfectly well-behaved and/or normal, who have never in their lives had any sort of behavioral difficulty?

An American fad

Although a lot of our information these days comes from The States, and much of the research into the causes of ADHD goes on there, ADHD is not "American." In fact, the symptoms were first outlined in Britain in the early part of this century by Professor George Still.

Although the actual name of the condition has changed many times since 1902, the condition has not, although our knowledge of ADHD has grown somewhat since then. In the UK, we are in the early stages of accepting, understanding and treating the condition, lagging somewhat behind other countries. Unfortunately, there are one or two professionals who were taught a certain way, many, many years ago, who are very resistant to change and staying up-to-date with modern ideas. Eventually though, as more people learn about the condition, more professionals will have the correct knowledge to diagnose and treat it.

An excuse for lazy, uncooperative children

How many times have we heard a teacher say to us, "Well, little Johnny did it yesterday, so he can do it today." No he can't!

One of the major factors of ADHD is inconsistency, and although frustrating for parents and teachers who don't really understand this disparity, it is also frustrating to the sufferer too. A child who cannot perform at the same level from hour-to-hour, never mind from day-to-day, can appear lazy or uncooperative, that's true. But unless the people working with children, like ours, understand that this is part of their make-up, the battles will continue to go on.

I once heard a S.N.A. say "He can concentrate when he wants to," but the word she left off the end of that sentence was ... SOMETIMES. Yes, these kids can concentrate when they want to-sometimes. Sometimes they can't. Only education will help these people work more successfully with our kids.

I'm not knocking all educational professionals, of course. The above are only isolated examples and there are some excellent teachers and special-needs workers out there. But if your school has entrenched ideas about how ALL children do/should perform, you need to bring them up to date on ADHD.

It's another name for a boisterous child

True, kids with ADHD tend to be on the boisterous side, but the cluster of problems which appear when the condition is present are so extreme that they cause considerable problems educationally, socially and in the home. Boisterous children do settle down over time and learn by experience as they develop. ADHD kids largely do not. If anything, if left undiagnosed and treated, over time they get worse.

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1. Myth: ADD/ADHD only affects children - It is difficult to estimate how many ADHD children become ADHD adults, but it's thought to be around the 50% mark! Although hyperactivity subsides later in life, in its place is left an overwhelming feeling of restlessness. Also, many of the planning and organization problems encountered by the ADHD child are taken into adulthood.

2. Myth: Parents are to blame for their children's condition - Many parents are told that by the very people who they go to for help. People who blame parents for this condition are ignorant, stupid, or even possibly, both. For the parent still struggling to find a reason for their child's problems, this may be difficult to accept. There is nothing like a mother's guilt! With education, of course, comes knowledge and once a parent accepts that they are no more to blame than the parent of a physically disabled child, they can move forward in a positive fashion.

3. Myth: More boys than girls have ADHD - Apart from girls manifesting the symptoms differently than boys, there has also been much LESS research done on females. On top of this, the diagnostic criteria, which fits the male model of ADHD, is still used as a tool for diagnosing girls. Boys frequently stick out more because of their boisterous, overactive behavior. It is thought that more girls have the "spacey ADD" and have more learning difficulties than their male counterparts.

4. Myth: ADD is over-diagnosed - This depends on how you look at it. However, it's believed that ADHD is under-diagnosed in Great Britain at the present time. One reason is because parents are afraid to bring their suspected ADHD children into the doctor. Unfortunately, they're concerned about the use of stimulant medication in treating children. The media here has presented a very negative picture of that.
   What these people are forgetting though, is not all ADHD-diagnosed children are on medication. Some parents use other strategies such as dietary measures, homeopathy and nutritional supplements, to name just a few. Many parents are now wanting to try the natural or holistic approaches to managing ADHD.

5. Myth: Ritalin zonks out children or turns them into zombies - Complete rubbish. These emotive statements are put out by extremists who know little about ADHD and it's effects. Like ANY medication, the pros and cons have to be looked at before taking any course. Stimulants do have side-effects sometimes. These are well documented. A parent or practitioner looks at these possible side-effects and weighs them up against the possible improvement in the quality of life of the sufferer. No one forces anyone to take stimulant medication. If a parent finds that Ritalin doesn't suit her child, she is at liberty to take the child off.

6. Myth: ADHD can be cured with the correct discipline - Unfortunately this misconception is rife amongst other parents and many professionals. Parents of ADHD children in fact instill MORE disciplinary measures than ordinary parents. We have to, because our children challenge so many more boundaries. Another thing to consider is the difference between inability and non-compliance. Punishing a child for something that they have no control over is cruel. ADHD kids don't enjoy being in trouble the whole time and do not bring further aggravation on themselves for amusement. Anyone who says ADHD can be cured by discipline is misguided.

7. Myth: A child who can concentrate sometimes, can't have ADHD - A child who can't concentrate on mundane, boring or repetitive tasks can actually hyper-focus on something which he or she is really interested in. Computer games, and the like, are very stimulating to the ADHD child. It's a "one-on-one" situation and there's usually plenty of action to keep their interest. Because they can concentrate on something which they are REALLY interested in, it doesn't mean they CAN'T have ADHD.

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As a result of having two children with multiple learning disabilities, Judge David Admire of Northeast District Court in Redmond Washington, became concerned that many of the defendants appearing before him also had learning disabilities. This was especially evident from the frustration that boiled over and recognized as similar to his son's reactions. After asking the mother of one defendant whether her son had learning disabilities, the woman began to cry and said that no one previously had cared enough to ask.

Believing that the number of learning disabled defendants could be significant, Judge Admire contacted the Learning Disabilities Association of Washington to devise a method to verify and address this situation. In conjunction with the Learning Disabilities Association, a six week test period was established where every defendant who pled or was found guilty was screened to determine if an in depth evaluation for learning disabilities was warranted. 37% of those individuals screened were found to be candidates for further testing.

In late 1988, the Learning Disabilities Association of Washington established and implemented the Life Skills Program to assist offenders with learning disabilities (LD) and/or attention deficit disorder (ADD). For those offenders who are placed on probation, the judges of the King County District Court, Northeast Division have directed that a condition of probation requires defendants be screened and evaluated for learning disabilities and, if appropriate, complete the Life Skills Program of the Learning Disabilities Association. Failure to do so places a defendant in violation of the terms of his sentence which can result in the imposition of jail or other punitive consequences.

The program targets LD and/or ADD misdemeanor and gross misdemeanor offenders, between 17 and 45 years of age. The program provides:

1. Initial screening to determine if the client/offender possesses the basic tendencies, behavior and history consistent with learning and/or attentional disabilities.

2. An intake interview to determine need and appropriateness for the program.

3. Optional testing and evaluation to confirm the diagnosis of LD and/or ADD.

4. A 14 week (28 hour) instructional class geared specifically toward the needs of the LD and ADD clients.

The Life Skills Program is designed to address the clients difficulties in social skills, anger management, decision making and problem solving. It also provides information on learning and attentional disabilities, offers suggestions on specific coping mechanisms and provides community resource information. A supplementary manual for both clients and instructors has been developed.

As a result of the program clients become aware of the personal characteristics that are related to or the result of their LD and/or ADD, such as: getting lost; confusing right and left; being late for work or appointments; forgetfulness and/or losing things. Clients also become aware of how they process information such as: difficulty in understanding or following directions; not understanding information the first time it is given; being easily distracted by background noise or having a short attention span.

Clients learn specific social skills such as: how to express a complaint; how to prepare for a stressful conversation; how to deal with accusations; how to keep out of fights; how to express emotions and deal with the emotions of others. Clients also learn the skills in how to make "smart decisions" in problem solving and conflict resolution situations.

After completion of the Life Skills Program, the recidivism (re-offense) records of offenders are reviewed at 6 months, 1 year, 18 months and 2 years post intervention. Present data indicate a recidivism of 68% without the program, to 45% for offenders who start but do not complete the entire program, and a drop to only 29% for individuals who complete the entire 14 week program.

This program benefits the offender/participants by teaching them skills to improve their social functioning and reduce their misdemeanor behavior patterns. It also benefits the court system by reducing the "clogging" that occurs with repeat misdemeanor offenders and it benefits the general public who pay taxes that fund the court process or who may be victimized by the behavior of one of these offenders.

The information above doesn't begin to explain the benefits of programs such as this one. This program can be started in other areas. Materials are available through the Learning Disabilities Association of Washington to help other social service, education, business, court and correctional programs implement the Life Skills Program. LDA staff are also available to provide training and consultation at their office and also at program development sites. For more information on this program, or if you have any questions please email Judge David Admire at David.Admire @ metrokc.gov.

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Approximately 50-percent of children with ADHD become ADHD adults. Find out about diagnosis and treatment of ADHD in adults.

ADHD or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder affects thirty to fifty percent of adults who had ADHD in childhood. Accurate diagnosis of ADHD in adults is challenging and requires attention to early development, and symptoms of inattention, distractibility, impulsivity and emotional lability.

Diagnosis is further complicated by the overlap between the symptoms of adult ADHD and the symptoms of other common psychiatric conditions such as depression and substance abuse. While stimulants are a common treatment for adult patients with ADHD, antidepressants may also be effective.

ADHD receives considerable attention in both medical literature and the lay media. Historically, ADHD was considered to be primarily a childhood condition. However, recent data suggest that symptoms of ADHD continue into adulthood in up to fifty percent of persons with childhood ADHD.

Since ADHD is such a well-known disorder, adults with both objective and subjective symptoms of poor concentration and inattention have got the probabilities for evaluation. While the symptoms of ADHD have been extended developmentally upward to adults, most of the information about the etiology, symptoms and treatment of this disorder comes from observations of, and studies in, children (Weiss, 2001).

Diagnosis of Adult ADHD

For several reasons, family physicians may be uncomfortable evaluating and treating adult patients with symptoms of ADHD, particularly those without a previously established ADHD diagnosis. First, the criteria for ADHD are not objectively verifiable and require reliance on the patient's subjective report of symptoms. Second, the criteria for ADHD do not describe the subtle cognitive-behavioral symptoms that may affect adults more than children.

The family physician's role as diagnostician is further complicated by the high rates of self-diagnosis of ADHD in adults. Many of these persons are influenced by the popular press. Studies of self-referral suggest that only one third to one half of adults who believe they have ADHD actually meet formal diagnostic criteria.

Even as family physicians are knowledgeable about childhood ADHD, there is a noticeable absence of guidelines for primary care evaluation and treatment of adults with symptoms of the disorder (Goldstein and Ellison, 2002).

The diagnostic criteria describe the disorder in three subtypes. The first is the predominantly hyperactive, the second is the predominantly inattentive, and the third is a mixed type with symptoms of the first and the second.

Symptoms should be persistently present since age seven. While a longstanding symptom history is often difficult to elicit clearly in adults, it is a key feature of the disorder.

The following are the symptoms:

Inattention: where a person often fails to give close attention to details or makes careless mistakes, often has difficulty sustaining attention in tasks, often does not seem to listen when spoken to directly, or often does not follow through on instructions.

Tasks: Where a person often has difficulty organizing tasks and activities, often avoids, dislikes or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort, often loses things necessary for tasks or activities, often easily gets distracted by extraneous stimuli, or is often forgetful in daily activities.

Hyperactivity: Where a person often fidgets with hands or feet or squirms in seat, often feels restless, often has difficulty engaging in leisure activities quietly, or often talks excessively.

Impulsivity: Where a person often blurts out answers before questions have been completed, or often interrupts or intrudes on others.

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There is a growing consensus that the central feature of ADHD is disinhibition. Patients are unable to stop themselves from immediately responding, and they have deficits in their capacity for monitoring their own behavior. Hyperactivity, while a common feature among children, is likely to be less overt in adults. Utah criteria may be called the imperative criteria for this. For adults, it is used like this: What is the childhood history consistent with ADHD? What are the adult symptoms? Does the adult have hyperactivity and poor concentration? Is there any affective lability or hot temper? Is there the inability to complete tasks and disorganization? Is there any stress intolerance, or impulsivity? (Wender, 1998)

Wender developed these ADHD criteria, known as the Utah criteria, which reflect the distinct features of the disorder in adults. The diagnosis of ADHD in an adult requires a longstanding history of ADHD symptoms, dating back to at least age seven. In the absence of treatment, such symptoms should have been consistently present without remission. In addition, hyperactivity and poor concentration should be present in adulthood, along with two of the five additional symptoms: affective lability; hot temper; inability to complete tasks and disorganization; stress intolerance; and impulsivity.

The Utah criteria include the emotional aspects of the syndrome. Affective lability is characterized by brief, intense affective outbursts ranging from euphoria to despair to anger, and is experienced by the ADHD adult as being out of control. Under conditions of increased emotional arousal from external demands, the patient becomes more disorganized and distractible.

Treatment of Adult ADHD

Some treatments for ADHD in adults are as follows:

Stimulants: Stimulants work by increasing both blood flow and the levels of Dopamine in the brain, especially the frontal lobes where the brain's Executive Functions take place. Stimulants will increase the brain's ability to inhibit itself. This allows the brain to focus on the right thing at the right time, and to be less distracted, and less impulsive. Stimulants increase the "signal to noise ratio" in the brain.

Antidepressants: Antidepressants are considered a second choice for treatment of adults with ADHD. The older antidepressants, the tricyclics, are sometimes used because they, like the stimulants, affect norepinephrine and dopamine.

Other Medications: Sympatholytics have also been used in the management of ADHD as well as the non-stimulant ADHD medication, Strattera.

Self-Management Strategies: Adults with ADHD benefit considerably from direct education about the disorder. They can use information about their deficits to develop compensatory strategies. Planning and organization can be improved by encouraging patients to make lists and use methodically written schedules.

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References

Wender, Paul (1998). Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder in Adults . Oxford University Press.

Weiss, Margaret (2001). Adhd in Adulthood: A Guide to Current Theory, Diagnosis, and Treatment . Johns Hopkins University Press.

Goldstein, Sam; Ellison, Anne (2002). Clinicians' Guide to Adult ADHD: Assessment and Intervention. Academic Press.

Pete Wright is an attorney who represents children with disabilities. His practice is devoted exclusively to helping children with special education needs.

Pam Wright is a psychotherapist specializing in special needs children.

David is the HealthyPlace.com moderator.

The people in blue are audience members.

Conference Transcript

David: Good Evening. I'm David Roberts. I'm the moderator for tonight's conference. I want to welcome everyone to HealthyPlace.com. We have only been open for 2 weeks. This is our third online conference. Our conference tonight is on "Special Education Law: What Every Parent Needs to Know". We are fortunate because we have two excellent guests on the subject. Attorney Pete Wright and his wife, psychotherapist, Pam Wright. Their site is Wright's Law.

Pete Wright is an attorney who has represented children with disabilities for more than 20 years. His practice is devoted exclusively to helping children with special education needs. Pam Wright is a psychotherapist. Her training in clinical psychology and clinical social work give her a unique perspective on parent-child - -school dynamics, problems, and solutions.

Good evening Pete and Pam, welcome to the HealthyPlace.com site. Pete, I want to start off touching on some legal issues. Why is it so difficult for so many parents of special needs children to get what the law says their child deserves when it comes to the education system?

Pete Wright: Wow, what a question to open with.

It goes back decades, to issues of school culture and power within the system, like medical insurance and HMO's. Schools are like production lines and when something disrupts the flow, all hell breaks loose, and the slowdown in production is blamed on the part and the worker, i.e., the student and the teacher. Appropriate is a word defined by the courts and has resulted in extensive litigation, it started with the Rowley case where Amy was doing better on grades and educational achievement tests than her peers, and some courts said the program needed to maximize, others said not that much, and U.S. Supreme Court said all of the lower courts were basically wrong, that the program had to be individually designed to meet the child's unique needs in a program from which the child would benefit. A basic floor of opportunity, but not the best or optimize or maximizes. Those words are fatal in a report or being used by a parent. The best way to lose your fight for your children in education is to say "that I want what is best," or to have that written in the report.

Pam Wright: David, there is little agreement about what children are entitled to. The law says children are entitled to a Free Appropriate Public Education or FAPE. Parents must never ask for what is BEST for their children, only what is "appropriate." So we say "BEST" is a four-letter word that parents must avoid.

Pete Wright: Additional response to your opening question is that it all goes back to dollars and costs, short term.

David From letters I've received this afternoon, prior to the conference, I think a lot of parents, Pam, are afraid to go into the school and ask for what their "child is entitled to". Maybe they feel intimated by that. What suggestions do you have for handling that?

Pam Wright: Many parents feel intimidated by schools, period. So its hard to go to an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) meeting and deal with all the "experts" on the other side of the table. It helps to have someone go to the IEP meeting with you, and parents should dress up for the meetings like they would to go to church! Because "image' is important, especially in schools which are often pretty old fashioned.

Pete Wright: What is the child entitled to? Entitlement is in the eyes of the beholder. The best education? a minimal education? there is no easy answer to that. School staff may say that the entitlement is one hour a week, but a private expert says an hour a day of whatever. We always seek what is best, however, though, we clearly are not entitled to that in the eyes of the law.

Pam Wright Parents need to prepare for meetings - this will help keep their nervousness down.

Pete Wright: Image and first impressions have tremendous weight toward helping your child get better services. Too many parents blow it by sending sloppy letters, appearing disorganized. Look and act professionally.

Pam Wright: In special education, and in so many things, the key to success lies in the preparation.

Pete Wright: A top of the line meal on a mediocre plate vs. a mediocre meal served with all of the fancy trappings, is initially presumed to taste better, even if it does not.

David: Here are some audience questions:

codecan: Hi, my son is in a severe behavior classroom he has ADHD and ADD. The problem is I am fighting the school to give my son either a gym time or recess! They have every excuse going right now. Aren't they in violation of his rights?

Pam Wright: Codecan: Your son is in a behavior class. Is this all the time?

codecan: yes.

Pete Wright: codecan, do other children get gym time or recess? If yes, why doesn't your son? What is the reason given?

codecan: all day long and even eat lunch in the room.

Pam Wright: Most kids who have behavior problems have other problems which cause the behavior problems - you mentioned ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), but most kids with ADHD also have learning disabilities and frustration. So the question is: is this placement appropriate?

Pete Wright: Have you brought this up in an IEP meeting?

CarlaB: Re: IEP- How will parents be regularly informed of progress? (by such means as a periodic report card.) My school district claims that by putting a generic computerized statement on his regular report card, this meets this requirement. The statement reads, "Progress made on IEP goals/obj". Is this legal?

Pete Wright: Doesn't sound legal to me, please read Appendix A about IEPs at our website or in our book. You need to have clear information about whether the goals and objectives are being met, and the goals and objectives should be directly related to the present levels of performance listed on IEP, i.e. scores in various educational achievement tests or other measures.

Pam Wright: So you should get information about the progress your child is making. This will tell you whether the IEP needs to be revised or services increased. Bottom line: is the child learning? How do you know? How do you measure learning? So child's progress needs to be measured objectively and often.

Pete Wright: Progress made. What do they mean by progress made? How did they measure it? With true measures or just subjective feelings and beliefs?

David: One question I have, we all get frustrated and we all know the administrators and other school officials may jerk us around. But getting a lawyer is very expensive and my guess is the school system couldn't care less if you do. How can you best handle a difficult situation and when is it time to get a lawyer?

Pam Wright: The best thing to do is to prevent problems when possible.

Pete Wright: Good question. Real question: how can you get what your child needs without getting a lawyer? Answer: by preparing for a lawsuit.

Pam Wright: You do this by staying organized, keeping child's records organized by date as we discuss in our Tactics Manual. Learn how to measure progress, and about legal rights and responsibilities, and how to write polite letters that create a paper trail. When parents do this, most will never need a lawyer.

Pete Wright: In other words, the best way to avoid litigation is to assume it will happen and prepare for it, and also, parents should assume that they cannot testify at their own special education due process hearing and that they cannot call school witnesses to testify on their behalf. In other words, document by many nice letters and have private sector evaluations and tape record and then TRANSCRIBE the tape recording and follow up meeting with a letter.

Pam Wright: School people know this person has the evidence if it is necessary, so is less likely to draw a line in the sand. One more thing. If parents ask for something, they won't get it so they need to get someone else to recommend it: a private sector psychologist, doctor, etc.

Pete Wright: Schools are like HMO's and are not afraid of you getting a lawyer. Never threaten to get one either, that is counter-productive. We have several articles on our website regarding this. About emotions and crisis situations and about preparing for due process.

Becca: In a previous newsletter, you mentioned education forums that taught techniques to avoid IDEA compliance. Tell me more about this.

Pam Wright: I think you were thinking about seminars by a law company. These are normal ways for each side to get training. Defense lawyers get one kind of training, insurance defense lawyers get training but they don't get the same training!

GAM: I have a child in a private Catholic school who is having problems in school and failed a subject and the principal is keeping him off school sports for the marking cycle. I read an article by another lawyer stating a court case which found the refusal to let an ADHD child participate in athletics to be in violation of section 504. Is this true? Where can I find the precedent for this particular problem?

Pete Wright: One publishing company had a program about "Building Defensible Programs", i.e., which was interpreted as defending in court. The program was actually quite good and said in essence: provide a good program and you wont get sued.

Pam Wright: I wouldn't fight a big battle over one marking period, but I would try to use the time to help your child get focused on school and if sports are what he loves, this may help him. Pick your battles carefully. Also, get an expert to say your son needs sports.

Pete Wright: Is the child off the team because of a good disability or because of poor grades, that's the issue.

pvx: I'm in South Carolina and have an interest in 504 complaints. My county is about to build a NEW and BETTER segregated facility for about 350 from 7 school districts. I'm about to file an OCR complaint. Any advice?

Pete Wright: pvx, more info, new and better segregated, do you mean a special education school, or one that will not have special education kids?

pvx: Segregated, especially OH and MR (Mental Retardation).

Pam Wright: The amended IDEA focuses more on LRE which means more inclusion, read Appendix A, and find a way to structure your complaint so it is easy for OCR (Office of Civil Rights) to rule in your favor.

Pete Wright: OH and mental retardation are out, or in the school?

pvx: We have 7 districts that feed the low incidents to the CDC.

Pete Wright: Try to look at other OCR complaints and polish it up so that it is visually very attractive to read. Assuming you mean it is a school for kids with disabilities only, OCR would be very interested in your complaint.

Pam Wright: But you need to present a very polished complaint!

Pete Wright: So often, letters and complaints are not well put together and have a strike against them before even being read. First impression often controls.

junebotto: I live in NY state. My son was referred in Sept of 1998 and we did not have a Children with Special Education meeting until the following Sept. 1999. I would like the Special Department and the school to be penalized for this but according to my Esq. I have no recourse. Do you agree?

Pete Wright: It would all depend on very specific facts. Did you know of timeline being extended and not act on that. Courts uniformly say, one who sleeps on their rights, waives them. Or, in the alternative: what type of penalty were you thinking about? If the delay did not create harm, Courts say, no harm, no foul, thus it is very fact specific, and also, sometimes you may have a good claim, but to exercise it in the end may create damage to the child. And if your attorney handles special education law, then that person may be advising you based on the totality of the situation. What could you really recover has to be the real question.

David: And again, I think it's important to stress here, when something doesn't go the way we like, as a parent and an individual, we'd like to see some sort of punishment. However, I think what Pete and Pam are saying is, you are better off working within the system, than expending emotional and financial energy trying to fight it, if you can. Here are some more questions.

midwestmom: My son's IEP designation is currently "OHI"; our school district has suggested that if we change it to MI my son could qualify for more services. Are some categories/labels more "powerful" than others? Should I care?

Pam Wright: Child should receive what the child needs, regardless of the "label". The revised IDEA says child should get services, even with NO label!, up to a certain age.

Pete Wright: Label does not drive either services or the IEP. The law was changed in 1997 and is very clear about that. Policies within school districts may not have changed, however. If your child needs the services and suffers from the new, unknown, wrightslaw syndrome, and a heretofore new disturbing label, should that exclude the child from some services and open door to others?

Pam Wright: I imagine the school has Program A for kids with one "label" and Program B for kids with another, and isn't individualizing the IEPs enough just trying to fit the child into their pre-existing program?

Kerny1: I have a daughter with borderline mental retardation IQ. She is in a regular fourth-grade class receiving push-in Special Education services. She is having difficulty mastering the grade level subjects. Can she go to fifth grade and have her program modified to her level even though it is NOT grade 5 level work as the other students? We live in NY.

Pete Wright: To kerny1, issue is acquisition of the basic reading, writing, arithmetic and spelling skills, as primary over all other issues, such as 5th grade vs. 4th grade vs. other curriculum. It is important to master the basic skills, which can be done, but may require more intense services. Children with Down's Syndrome can read on age level. So often expectations are too low. In other words, are you sure you really want work modified, or the total program intensified? That's what I recommend

Pam Wright: Because of the standards movement, and state testing, the issue Kerny brings up will affect many kids.

Pete Wright: What if Helen Keller was in the system today, what would she get to acquire basic reading, writing, arithmetic skills?

Pam Wright: Helen Keller went on to write books, speak, and lead a movement.

David: Pam, as a psychotherapist who has a lot of experience with special needs children, does a child have to get everything from the school system or can tutoring and other special programs work too.

Pam Wright: The most important thing is to ensure that the child gets the services he or she needs. In many cases, its better to get tutoring than to fight a war, if you can do so. The problem is that many people don't have other resources.

David: From the audience, I'd be interested in getting very short responses to this question and then I'll post it for everyone to see. If you've been successful in dealing with your school system, what do you attribute that to? Here are some of the audience responses to my question:

seisen: Success with school system....persistence and information

Dabby: Always dangle the carrot before you bring out the stick! Don't anger them. Try to know more than they do before you go to a meeting. If you feel to close to the situation bring someone with you who can be objective.

brandi valentine: Knowing my rights! Also, having them over a barrel helped a little to :) However, I would never have known they had crossed that line if I hadn't known my rights.

Childsvoice: It came from acquiring as much knowledge about our rights as I could get my eyes on! Many thanks to Pete and Pam for their web site and their publications.

CarlaB: Knowing the law, and following the strategies set forth on the Wrightslaw website :-).

bpmom: Only success we've had (too few) were due to being the "squeaky wheel" and knowing the law and knowing how to make "subtle threats".

Mathilda: Our county school system is fully in support of its SED (Special Education) kids; but it is under contract with the local mental health agency, who is less than supportive, to put it mildly.

green9591: I haven't been. Superintendent cares only for saving $ not the kids.

David: I noticed Brandi Valentine is in the audience tonight. Just wanted to recognize her. She's well known on the internet and also has her site in the HeatlhyPlace.com ADD Community.

Pam Wright: I think Brandi had one of the 1st web sites on the internet. Glad to see you. It contains a wealth of information.

Pete Wright: Re Tutoring: So often private sector tutoring after school can be far more valuable. That is what worked for me. Two years, one-on-one, every day, after school. I was no longer considered emotionally disturbed and borderline mentally retarded. (The story is at our wrightslaw.com website.)

David: Here are some more audience questions:

jackie R: My son is in a section 27 class, and will be losing his placement after June because the school is for kids in residence, and he moved home. :-).

David: What can Jackie do about that?

Pam Wright: Assuming son is 14 or older, he needs a transition plan.

Pete Wright: Jackie, I'm not sure what the question is? Should he be home or at the school? Is there a more appropriate one nearby. Need more info please. The IDEA focuses on the fact that school is a mean to an end so kids need assistance in making transitions.

Pete Wright: PS What is section 27?

Pam Wright: Assuming son still has a disability, son still needs an appropriate education, although he may not need residential placement. BUT placement decision cannot be made until after Individualized Education Plans goals and objectives.

cadkins: What does the IDEA say about Time Out closets in EBD rooms? Is it legal to place children in there for long periods? Can children without IEPs be placed in there?

Pam Wright: Short answer is that school districts are being sued over this. We have 2 cases on our site about this. I think they are abominable and there have been a flurry of $$$$ dollar damage lawsuits because of them?

Pete Wright: Read some of the cases and get some community organization and a lawsuit going.

Pam Wright: The Witte case in Nevada and a recent case in KY or TN.

Pete Wright: There are often very strict state standards for that type of placement in a state mental hospital. Are the standards missing with schools?

Pam Wright: That just came out. If child has a behavior problem, needs to have a functional behavior assessment per IDEA. Another question?

David: Here are some additional responses from the audience to my question about how to deal successfully with the school system.

hsiehfriel: I work closely with the teachers, the school psych and the principal. I met with them even before my child entered first day of class to let them know I was an involved parent, interested in building a team approach.

SED teacher: I am curious about restraints. I have taught in NY, VA, and now FL. This is my first experience with "hands-on". I was trained and continue to use verbal de-escalation and have not used restraint. I am overwhelmed by the frequent application and intensity of hands before words. This is very disturbing personally and professionally. What is my recourse?

Pam Wright: We are getting many questions from special education teachers about things like this, too many children in classes. Can you get help from CEC or a special ed or education group?

Pete Wright: I am amazed by the use of physical force.

Pam Wright: Who can teachers turn to when asked to do things that are illegal or immoral or just plain wrong?

Pete Wright: I worked several years in a juvenile training school as a houseparent and we did not have to use force with rapists, killers, very disturbed children. It was me and 20-25 of them, locked in a cottage ward, or sometimes in an unlocked cottage ward. It seems that some schools are gravitating toward almost a sadistic cruel way of working with children that they do not understand.

Pam Wright: I think special ed teachers are going to have to take a stand against this.

Pete Wright: But the question is, what is your recourse? All I can offer is for you to see if you can get literature and perhaps try to set up some training programs for staff and administrators regarding behavior control without use of force and timeout locked closets. It is done out there and the alternative may be a very large $$$ damage lawsuit. That fear of litigation can be a powerful motivator to change behavior when all else fails.

Shar: I cannot get the CSE Committee to understand the relationship between NVLD and anxiety and that children with learning disabilities can achieve excellent grades while overcompensating. Any suggestions with limited resources in rural USA?

Pam Wright: If you are on a special education teacher list, you may get some help from others. You will need to get a psychologist or evaluator to write recommendations as to what child needs. As a parent, you have little or no credibility when you are dealing with school people so you need someone else to make the recommendations.

Pete Wright: You are a parent, they will not hear you. Bring books, videos, etc, they will gather dust. Have someone else, private sector psych or whatever, be the lightning rod and catalyst for change. Have that person write a letter and send material and advise that they will do a follow up call to see if the info is helpful, for starters.

Julie C: Under the Special Education laws, are children with learning disabilities entitled to a tutor paid at the school districts expense if the child is in need of more educational instruction?

Pete Wright: Re Tutoring: So often private sector tutoring after school can be far more valuable. That is what worked for me. Two years, one-on-one, every day, after school. I was no longer considered emotionally disturbed and borderline mentally retarded. (The story is at our wrightslaw.com website.)

Pam Wright: BTW: Mel Levine's work is excellent in this area. He is in NC.

Pete Wright: Nothing prohibits payment of private tutor, except tradition, policies, never done it before, this is the way we always do it, and other such reasons.

Pam Wright: Some public school supervisors will believe you have insulted their staff, who are of course, the best!

Pete Wright: Gerry Spence's book How to Argue & Win Every Time: At Home, At Work, In Court, Everywhere, Everyday, at our website talks about how to change perceptions.

Pam Wright: It's How to Argue and Win Every Time and it's about persuasion, not argument.

David: Here's a question that I'm sure concerns many parents:

cambridge: Can the "system" force a child to take medications against the will of the parents?

Pete Wright: Meds - I don't think so, get a doctor to advise against it and have it in writing and ask school whose advice should you follow, theirs or the doctor?

Pam Wright: Again, you are getting an outside person to be the lightning rod.

Pete Wright: Meds - follow up, ritatin and dex, etc, I have taken them from time-to-time and found them helpful, was on Dexedrine during middle school years.

David: Here's a question about Individualized Education Plans (IEP):

AnnaB: Is it part of the law that parents receive proposals prior to an IEP meeting when requested in writing?

Pam Wright: You request to receive proposals before the IEP meeting? The reality is that people are pulling stuff together at the last minute.

Pete Wright: Proposed IEP, does not have to be furnished in advance, Evaluations, I don't believe they have to be furnished in advance, but good practice is to provide them, otherwise how can parent offer meaningful input into IEP or even be expected to sign documents at that time.

Pam Wright: Like at midnight the night before. So yes, you should be able to ask but they may not be able to provide what you want. You can always ask for another meeting.

David: One thing I also want to ask and I think this is a legitimate concern among many parents. They go to the school, try and work within the system, but things aren't going well. They may or may not stand up for their child because they are afraid of being a "lightning rod" for retaliation against their child by the teachers or administrators. Can you elaborate on that a bit and make some positive suggestions on how best to deal with this train of thought?

Pam Wright: First, develop a businesslike relationship. One of the participants talked about meeting people before her child started school. It's often helpful to get someone to come to these meetings - this person can validate what happened. The best way to prevent problems is to prepare for them, so get your child's file organized, learn about how to measure progress, get a book about how to write letters. But you will always be somewhat afraid because this is YOUR child.

Pete Wright: Parents often generate staff anger toward them because staff views them as not being appreciative of their efforts. Parents have anger toward staff because they see child falling further-and-further behind. This becomes a catch 22. I hope this stops. Parent must become more professional than the staff, aka Ms. Manners, with thank you letters that are later evidence if necessary. Become calm cool collected tactics and strategy mindset. We have a lot about that in our Tactics Manual.

Pam Wright: There is no way to eliminate this fear because it is sometimes based on reality.

David: Here are a few audience comments regarding this last question:

Donna1: Administrators, or should I say "this" administrator is always willing to work with parents, but don't come in ready to knock the door down when you (as a parent) haven't given me a chance.

shine84: I have a son who is being tested for ADHD . He has already been suspended from kindergarden twice for inappropriate conduct . Also while on a field trip one of my friends saw my son and went up to him to talk and the teacher had such a tight grip on his hand he could not go anywhere, but the other kids where running around and playing. Is this fair and appropriate?

Pete Wright: For the administrator, often the parent was there once before, but as the child or adolescent that was suffering school failure and abuse, and old emotions come to the surface.

Pam Wright: First issue: is it appropriate to suspend a kindergarten child? I'd say "No!" But the teachers often don't have any training in how to deal with the children, so that becomes an issue that parent need to address. Get schools to do more training for the teachers so the teachers can do a better job.

Pete Wright: Bizarre, suspending a kindergarten child. You need a comprehensive private sector series of evaluations and look carefully not just at ADD behavior, but mastery of the 3R's and written language. That is too often overlooked with the ADD child exhibiting difficult behaviors.

David: What about the idea of getting a "child advocate"? Can you explain what that is, give us any idea of what that costs, and what the positives and negatives of that are?

Pam Wright: Child advocate? There are currently no standards so I can be one, Pete is one, many parents are advocates. This is an important question and not enough time to answer.

Costs: Usually an hourly rate, fairly reasonable.

Biggest issue: is training of the advocate!

Pete Wright: Advocate come in all sizes and shapes. Some very qualified, others put gasoline on fires truly believing they are using a fire extinguisher. Word of mouth is the best referral source. There is no national law or standard regarding advocate. One of the best in the country is Pat Howey. There is an organization COPAA, Council of Attorneys and Advocates at www.copaa.net that we are members of, and a good source to locate an advocate.

Mathilda: What do you do when the local behavioral health dept. is breaking the law regarding its obligation to Special Education Disorder kids in a self-contained classroom?

Pete Wright: More specifics?

Pam Wright: There is no law that requires any type of child to be in a self-contained class.

Mathilda: CA has a law -- AB3632 -- that allows group home placement of special education disorder kids if it will help them get the most out of their education. LMHA is refusing 3632 referrals from the schools.

Pete Wright: Sounds like state agency heads need to battle it out. How about CA Protect and Advocacy assisting.

Pam Wright: One interesting side effect from alternative schools is that for many kids, they are making excellent progress because the schools are small and the education is more individualized. So this can be a good thing for some kids.

Kodiak: Do parents have a say in determining what's appropriate?

Pam Wright: Absolutely, that's the law, input at the individualized education plans meeting.

Pam Wright: According to IDEA, parents are equal participants in the IEP process but in reality, many schools do not operate this way!

Pam Wright: However, whatever the parent asserts as appropriate, often damns it, have your private sector expert say it is appropriate.

David: Here's a related question for Pam:

Luvmyson: Pam; what is the difference between what is best and what is appropriate? I have always used term appropriate.

Pam Wright: GOOD FOR YOU! Never use the word "best" - it is fatal! The law says your child is entitled to a Chevrolet (appropriate), not a Cadillac (best)! School people will use the word "best" but parents should always use appropriate.

Pam Wright: Luvmyson, good for you, never use the word BEST, it is a 4 letter word, because, by law, your child is clearly not entitled to it. Never let it sneak into a private sector report either!

Pam Wright: Of course, when we say "appropriate", we are talking about a good program for the child.

hsiehfriel: I have always been careful to use the term 'appropriate,' but the district and I still don't always agree on what's "appropriate." How can parents get past that hurdle?

Pam Wright: Good question and hard to answer here. Your private sector expert should say that XYZ is what the child needs, at a minimum, for an appropriate education.

Pete Wright: That is the hurdle. Read our Understanding Tests and Measurements article at wrightslaw, read it over and over and over, master it, then make charts with power point, take them in to the meeting, visuals are powerful, focus on persuasive skills, ala Spence, that's a start.

DBillin168: Pam and Pete, I have your book and really enjoyed it. My problem is my district ONLY has inclusion, no other continuum of service. My district is saying it can send my child to another district because it does not offer self contained classes (which I feel my child needs) is this true?

Pam Wright: No! The school is required by law to offer a continuum of placements. Inclusion or mainstreaming is the first thing that must be considered, not the only thing.

Pete Wright: They have to offer a continuum, but necessarily within their own district, dependent upon realities and case law. They may have to pay money for the other program.

Pam Wright: Think about it. If the school only offers inclusion, then they aren't individualizing the program to the unique needs of this child.

green9591: If in your individualized education plan for 2000-2001 school year, no mention was made that your child will be attending another program, do you have to send your child to this program even if the existing program may be discontinued?

Pam Wright: The IEP should describe in detail the services the district will provide . . you should read Appendix A which talks about this.

David: Earlier, we were talking about Child Advocates. Here's an answer from one of our audience members:

sheritm: In reference to the question on advocates, the mission of www.amicusforchildren.org is to help parents be the children's first & best advocate by providing them with information that we research for them - based on their individual service requests. Sometimes the situations are so extreme that advocates and/or attorneys are needed. You can look for an advocate through agencies that are specific to your child's disability. And COPAA is a great resource, some state Parent Resource Centers.

Pete Wright: If the program is discontinued where will the child go. The case law replacement and program often waffles about it being the xyz placement at 123 school, and it could be the xyz placement at the 789 school, or the abc placement at the 123 school and schools will often present a change that way and it sells to the court.

Pam Wright: The individualized education plan should specify the child's program, including placement, in detail. You should not sign an IEP if you are uncertain about what your child will receive.

taj gilligan: I have a question regarding the SAT. My daughter has ADD and apart from extended time accommodations, is there anything else I should ask for?

Pete Wright: Whoever in private sector tested your child will have the best answer as to what type of modifications and/or accommodations your child may need. So often written language disability is overlooked with ADD child.

suebell: In a very small, rural school district how do we "politely" request/demand that school staff (including aide) be specifically trained on how to teach and deal with the only autistic child in the district?

Pam Wright: Your school district should be getting help from the state department of education in this area because teacher training and preparation are extremely important and are discussed at length in IDEA. Also essential that aids be trained, and not just be babysitters.

Pete Wright: You try to have them see it thru your eyes. If they view your request as a demand, you will have a long battle and struggle. Their issue with autism is frequently economics. If you are seeking an ABA Lovaas type of program, videos may be helpful. It involves salesmanship, again, a la Gerry Spence.

David: It is getting very late and the Wright's have been here for 2 hours. I really appreciate that and I hope that everyone got something beneficial out of tonight's conference. I also want to thank everyone in the audience for not only coming, but also participating. We can all learn from each other. Pete and Pam Wright's site is www.wrightslaw.com.

Pam Wright: We'd like to thank David for his help on this!

Pete Wright: David, this has been an enjoyable experience. You have done a great job and healthyplace is off to a great start. We thank you.

Pam Wright: I second that! Bye.

David: Thank you again Pete and Pam. Everyone, we will be holding many more ADD related conferences and I hope you will register on our community list so you can be notified of what's going on.

Good night everyone.