Anxiety can bring about schizoaffective and schizophrenic voices, as I've written before. And I've written about how much they scare me, even though I know they’re not real. When I say “voices,” I literally mean hearing voices-- actually hearing them-- even though they aren’t there. It is one of the hallmark symptoms of schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder, and for me it’s triggered by anxiety.

As part of my schizoaffective disorder, I sometimes suffer from suicidal ideation, which is different from being suicidal. Basically, it means I think about killing myself, but I’ve never made an actual attempt. Still, it’s scary, because 10% of people with schizophrenia and 10% of people with schizoaffective disorder die of suicide. Suicidal ideation in schizoaffective disorder, schizophrenia is so scary that one time I decided I had to go to the hospital.

I have schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. It’s very common for anxiety to accompany bipolar disorder. So that means I have to deal with all the stress, obsessive worries, and other pitfalls of anxiety while dealing with my schizoaffective disorder (and many are in this same situation with schizophrenia). Let me give you a breakdown on what it's like living with schizoaffective disorder and anxiety.

I have been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. But that wasn’t always the case. I was originally diagnosed with schizophrenia. So what does it mean to have schizoaffective disorder versus schizophrenia? For me, it’s meant a long learning curve that was frightening, confusing and reeling in meds changes. My doctor now focuses on symptoms rather than a hard and fast diagnosis. Still, some understanding the differences between schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder is helpful to me and my family.

I have schizoaffective disorder and I hear voices. The first time I heard them 16 years ago, I thought they were faeries. Sometimes I still think that. Faeries are troublemakers. So are my voices.

Schizophrenia is an illness that causes intense pain and distress for its victims. In our suffering, we can seek solace and relief in ways that can worsen our symptoms. Some of us will turn towards drugs and alcohol in a desperate attempt to dull our pain. I, myself, was one of those individuals. Initially, I used alcohol as a way to cope with the pain that I experienced due to my schizophrenia symptoms. This temporary relief came at a great cost, however. Inevitably my illness worsened and my path towards recovery became more difficult.

Schizophrenia is a disease that affects our perception in ways that are unimaginable to most. Deep within the schizophrenic mind are a plethora of villains that haunt us our every waking hour. At one time I believed that these villains physically existed and would bring about my inevitable, torturous death. They stalked me, haunted me, and watched my every move all the time. They knew my thoughts, actions, whereabouts, and movements. They could manipulate my emotions and thoughts at will. I could even sometimes hear them. They would speak to me in angry, torturous ways. In this article, I will introduce you to several of these villains. Some of them are human while others are not. Though none of them exist, all of them were capable of inflicting indescribable pain upon me. These are the villains of schizophrenia.

Within the psychotic mind lies a mysterious place filled with voices and shadowy figures. Therein lies persecution and horror of otherworldly origin. What is it that brings this terror to us? Schizophrenia is a disease that is toxic to our minds, and brings on unusual beliefs and behaviors. An extension of these beliefs are dark, eerie voices from unseen places. These voices come from various origins and seem to have a conscious of their own. How is it that our minds can hear voices from nothingness? Is this a cruel trick of nature? How can a disease be so bizarre and menacing? The voices can unfold in different ways. For me, the beliefs and voices are one and the same. They mesh together to create a woven pattern of unreality, both tortuous and unseen.

Hallucinations are a prominent feature in many people who suffer from paranoid schizophrenia. Many of us will experience visual, tactile and auditory hallucinations during some period of our illness. The most common of these, and the only I have experienced, are auditory hallucinations. Hearing voices is extremely common for people with paranoid schizophrenia, and can be a terrifying and degrading experience for the sufferer.

A New Dawn for Schizophrenia Slipping through the cracks of the mental health system is all to easy for people who suffer from schizophrenia. Some of us wander the streets homeless. Others, end up in shelters and community homes. Though this is a common scenario today, in the future it will be less so. As bleak as the present may seem for many people, there will be a time when people with schizophrenia will defy the stereotypes that are associated with our illness. The reasons for this are as follows: