I began writing neither for money nor fame, but simply because I thought I had a message to send to the world.  I believed that many of the horrible events that had transpired in my life, were not without purpose.  That my experiences with schizophrenia and homelessness were not in vain, but brought about with reason.  This is what brings me here to you now, as a writer and advocate, who knows what it is like to be neither here nor there, both materially and mentally.  What follows is the path I took to send this message.  Here are the publications I have written and my inspiration behind them.

Well, it looks as if SAMHSA has redefined the term: Recovery. ScienceDaily (Jan. 5, 2012) — A new working definition of recovery from mental disorders and substance use disorders is being announced by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). The new working definition of Recovery from Mental Disorders and Substance Use Disorders is as follows: A process of change through which individuals improve their health and wellness, live a self-directed life, and strive to reach their full potential. So, what do you think? Ben has been "in recovery" since late in 2003, after his medication regime was stabilized and deemed effective. We cross our fingers each and every day that the psychiatric medications continue to work, and that he continues to take them despite his feeling that he doesn't need to. And so it goes.

I am at an impasse, with my writing and with my feelings.  Of course, these issues are related. Last month, I began writing here about mending my relationship with my ex-boyfriend Bob, and we've been getting along very well in the meantime.  We've reached a point of sharing that is different than at any time in our past:  I've been able to share my feelings - past and present - with Bob and he has admitted a level of honesty I never expected from him.  I was very happy, until I sought to write a long piece about our relationship for my personal blog and I couldn't come up with a way to tackle the topic.  That's when I knew that I had some negative reactions mixed in with my warm fuzzies.

As I continue writing Bob's 504 Plan (previously blogged here and here), I am amazed at how much of it seems to be common sense. Does a child really need "frequent restroom breaks" put into writing in order to use the restroom? (Being a substitute teacher, I've learned most kids won't go to the restroom every 20 minutes unless they're bored, need a break, or have a real physical need.) Sadly, it seems much "common sense" in education (indeed, all matters concerning children) has become anything but . Case in point: the accommodation in Bob's plan that created such a buzz--his notebook.

For days I have been tormented by blinding headaches, merciless nausea, recurrent waves of despair, and an overwhelming premonition of impending doom. At last I have discovered the source of my torment. The 2012 presidential campaign has officially begun. I am writing today from the New Hampshire hamlet I inhabit having just come back from voting in the nation’s first primary election. Returning home after exercising the franchise so many take for granted I had what people like me refer to as “an aha moment” – which is to say, I stumbled across an original thought. This is it – mentally ill people are uniquely qualified to redeem the unsightly quagmire we refer to as American politics.

Like an errant child avoiding homework, I've been putting off something important for almost a week: writing Bob's 504 Plan. Wait--isn't someone affiliated with the school district supposed to do that? One would think.

I've been studying mental illness for a long time and while I knew the answer to this question, I couldn't really have told you why. This is mostly because I haven't done a lot of work on personality disorders, but I have had occasion to learn more about them recently. No, bipolar disorder is not a personality disorder, and here's why.

Have you ever watched television, absentmindedly, and are shaken awake by the statement: "One in four people will suffer from a mental illness at some point in their lives." Great. My first instinct? Well, I feel less alone. The Mathematics of Mental Illness

Once upon a time, I didn't realize my ex was abusive. There were many reasons and excuses for deluding myself into thinking the problem was a relationship issue, and that we were equally at fault for the trouble in the marriage. By the time I came to terms with the fact that my ex was abusing me, that he was an abuser, I also realized that I had abused him, too. I had called him names, allowed my temper to overcome my sense, even slapped his face once and thrown keys at his head hoping my aim would, for once, be perfect.

In 1972, a kids program called "The Most Important Person" gave 3-minute self-esteem lessons about respecting yourself, learning from mistakes, and protecting yourself in the face of various meanies.  The theme song began with the following lyric: The most important person in the whole wide world is you and you hardly even know you. Almost 40 years after hearing that song for the first time, I often find myself repeating the lyric in my head.  Wouldn't it be great if that program was redone for adults?  What if someone made a "love yourself" cartoon for people with bipolar?