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Hard conversations are, well, hard. Maybe you are avoiding one by waiting for another person to initiate because you don't want to ruin your relationship. Maybe you are avoiding one by convincing yourself that there's nothing to talk about and that issues will magically melt away soon enough. Most of the time, unfortunately, this isn't true. Most of the time, you need to have a difficult conversation.
This post is not necessarily about wrist scars, as self-harm can come in many forms. This is just a reflection on my personal experiences with self-injury in the wrist and forearm area, as that's where I used to hurt myself. I feel most people react to scars similarly, especially if their reaction comes from ignorance or fear rather than love. Therefore, this post might be helpful if you know someone who self-harms and you wonder how to behave around them.
It can be easy to fall into a victim mentality with borderline personality disorder (BPD). You can often feel like your brain is working against you and making life unnecessarily hard. However, treating yourself as a victim can be detrimental and prevent you from recovering and moving on from traumatic events.
I feel as though people like to think about incidents of mental health stigma as little pockets in time, but really, they live beyond the moments they happen. These are not compartmentalized or filed away. We know stigma can have negative impacts on a person, but understanding the depth of those impacts starts with understanding how long that moment of stigma can exist for a person.
The iceberg theory is a frequently cited model of behavior which states that a person's behavior can only be properly understood in the context of the factors that caused it. What a person does is "the tip of the iceberg"-- what we don't see are the emotional, social, cultural, and other factors that lie beneath the surface and cause that behavior.
A blessing was recently bestowed upon my family--my brother, Billy, and his life partner, Sandy, had a baby girl, whom I adore. Even though they live in California and I live in Illinois, and even though I haven’t yet met Baby, watching videos of my niece has quickly become one of my coping skills for my schizoaffective anxiety.
Hurting yourself to get out of work or school can seem like a tempting option—maybe even your only option—when you're overwhelmed and feeling trapped. But self-harm is, ultimately, a solution that causes more problems than it solves.
As explored in a previous post, health stress and health anxiety can be exhausting and burdensome. Our health is a vital component of our lives, and when something isn't right, whether it's a chronic condition or an acute, short-lived experience, it is natural to experience anxiety and stress because of it. Here's how to gain the upper hand on health stress and anxiety.
Sometimes, stressful things can happen without the slightest hint of warning. Recently, I woke up to find that my laptop had just stopped working. I had used it the previous evening, and it seemed fine. But then, for whatever reason, the hard drive just died.
Like everything else in life, the risk factors for mental illness in children are impacted by both nature and nurture. Some of these risk factors I can do something about as a mother raising a child with mental illness, although some are out of my control. Accepting this has been one of the hardest parts of motherhood for me, but it's also been one of the most liberating.

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This is what happens when your therapist is not experienced with adhd or neurodivergence at all. Terribly unhelpful advice from your doctor reminiscent of things I was taught as an autistic person in ABA/Abusive therapy designed by the same guy who invented conversion therapy for gay kids.
13 year old kid
i have been phisacly abused and mentley with in volving rape
Kayel
I realize this was years ago, but in case you still struggle to communicate with reactive alters. If an alter is reactive, something is probably triggering a host. If it was sudden, think about the conversation you just had with them. And I mean the whole thing. Was there a point that their posture changed, or anything noticable? If you remember what you were talking about before that change, you can figure out why they are out.
Anything and everything is a trigger. Names, places, smells, tastes, everything.

If an alt acts defensively, it's best to stay calm and chose your wording to avoid misunderstandings. Do not let your hurt show if they are mean. That alter is likely trying to prove to the rest that no one can handle them, they are too far gone, and getting "help" would mean opening up to potentially more trauma. (It's very possible that they've experienced medical trauma/neglectigance from an early age as well, so.. lots of valid fear!) Patience is really important.
Gillian Bevis-King
I have been stalked; harassed; gas-lighted, repetitively, repetitively, repetitively...and infinitum...on and off...for months at a time for the last 11 years.
I have had EVERY crime perpetrated against me, over the course of the last 11 years, including 'rape'...except outright murder...that would be too obvious...or maybe he's building up to that...?
I am grateful each day I wake up and find myself still alive.
ALL THE OFFENCES ARE COVERT. HIDDEN. 'INVISIBLE' HE CREEPS INTO THE HOUSE AT NIGHT, WHILST I'M SLEEPING.
Changing locks umpteen times has not helped; CCTV has been equally useless because unless you know the EXACT time the person enters the building, you find yourself wading through tons of footage with nothing 'captured' on film.
I finally was driven to install Verisure Security System with cameras and alarm, but it has just become another 'toy' to be manipulated and keep others, away from the house.
It has all had the APPEARANCE of being PARANORMAL - Objects Displaced ; Things Going Missing and Things Appearing, in the house, which are not mine.
It all makes him look like God Almighty, but he isn't, although he is extremely highly intelligent - VERY SMART - very clever. I have two degrees but I am not as clever as he, is.
The police, certainly, are not.
Completely waste of time, because the bar, the level set for evidence by the Criminal Prosecution Service is so HIGH, as to be VIRTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE, if not, ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE, to attain.
It is NOT MY JOB, Anyhow to work as a volunteer, for the police.
MY JOB...is to...SAFE-GUARD my own MENTAL and PHYSICAL HEALTH (as far as this is possible)
ANOTHER TRICK, which he's quite fond of is seemingly, 'manifesting coins' and making it seem as if objects are materialising out of thin air (presumably by the use of some kind of remote control (?)
He was successful in driving me to have a nervous breakdown, last year, I am not going to allow that to happen, THIS year, if I have anything to do with it.
He has taught me to be an expert at managing extreme stress.
Elizabeth Caudy
Dear Vive, thank you for your comment. Have you considered taking her to a support group where she could talk to other people with schizoaffective disorder? Best, Elizabeth