advertisement

Blogs

Being the victim of verbal abuse can create vulnerabilities in several areas of life. I know that I still experience negative feelings of vulnerability even though I am no longer in an abusive situation. Thankfully, I am learning how to properly be vulnerable without making myself a target for further abuse.
If you hurt yourself when you fail at something, know you're not alone. Other people, myself included, have struggled with this urge—and have since found better ways to cope.
Terminal uniqueness is a concept I first learned about in eating disorder residential treatment. At the time, my restless, irritable teenage brain had no interest in the phrase. But over the years since, I've come to realize that terminal uniqueness is a common barrier to eating disorder recovery. In fact, it's not a unique or rare phenomenon at all—ironically enough. So what does terminal uniqueness mean, and how can it affect recovery? Let's unpack this further.
This week, "Snap Out of It!" talks to lawyer Julia Stephanides. She schools us on the rights people with mental illness have at work and how you can use those rights to better navigate working with a mental illness.
When some people read about those of us dealing with the effects of schizophrenia, they feel the same way I do about some other chronic illnesses. How can we find joy when we can't trust our minds? How do we function when we have to go through psychosis or stay at a psychiatric hospital or treatment facility? How do we go on when we hear voices or have paranoia or delusions of one form or another? How do we form relationships, go to school, or, if we are fortunate, go to work? 
I've been leaning into the practice of mindfulness lately, and the daily practice is helping me learn to accept my life situation at this moment as it is. Mindfulness helps me stay focused on what matters to me instead of slipping into eating disorder behavior when I am feeling sad, afraid, or angry. Mindfulness is helping me through binge eating disorder recovery.
I've been flitting in and out of a bipolar mixed mood for a while now, which leaves me trying to find the cause of my bipolar mixed mood. This is no mean feat. So many things can impact a bipolar mood state that narrowing it down to a single mixed mood cause is pretty tricky.
One concept that’s helped me a lot in recovery from mental illness is this: recovery is not linear. It seems simple, but understanding this helps me be aware that the recovery process may have peaks and valleys. It also helps me be aware of the changes that bring on peaks and valleys, like big life changes.
Death is coming for us all. I don't mean that to be threatening; I mean it to be relieving. Encouraging. Enlightening.
This week, "Snap Out of It!" talks about attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and binge eating disorder (BED) at work with Jason Hamburg. Jason is the Vice President of Neuroscience at Takeda Canada Inc. Jason wasn’t diagnosed with a mental illness until he was 44 years old, and he can attest to the fact that while he dealt with his mental illnesses in his own ways, those illnesses definitely held him back. Jason characterizes these illnesses as impulsive and compulsive, and the difference in experience before and after treatment was striking.

Follow Us

advertisement

Most Popular

Comments

Amanda
I dated a wonderful man for almost 3 years but he suffered severely from Crohn's Disease and Depression. His Crohn's made it hard for him to keep any kind of steady job and of course that disease can be "yucky" but I love him despite him being able to be the typical male provider. He was what I call, passively suicidal in that he would never commit the act but he prayed to God to not let him wake up because the Crohn's was so bad at times. He really struggled not feeling like a burden and he was worried I would eventually resent him for not being able to work. Neither of these things were true at all, but as many of you know, depression tells us otherwise. When there were better days where he felt physically better and therefore mentally better, he was the most thoughtful and loving person. I felt very cared for and very loved. I felt nothing but compassion for him on the not so good days. There were periods of time he would go dark and completely cut off communication with not only me, but his parents and sister. I never was mad about it, just concerned. I wanted so bad to just be with him even if we just laid there together and didn't talk. I just wanted him to know he did not have to go through it alone.

Well, eventually, the depression demons took hold and he told me on August 5th 2023 that he decided he wanted to just move to MT and isolate himself from everyone. He had been offered a free place to stay if he did some maintenance. He is very handy and that type of situation was very ideal because it was flexible; he only worked on things on the days he was physically up to it.
We talked every night like "normal" up until he left on April 14th 2023. We had a long distance relationship then and so I didnt get to see him in person often and didnt see him that last week. He told me one last time that he loved me and he was sorry to hurt me and I have not heard from him since. He didnt even tell his parents or sister he was leaving.
I still love him as much as I ever have even though it has been over a year since we last spoke. I just had dinner with a close friend who was always very critical of him because often he would have to cancel plans last minute due to the Crohn's or because he would go dark for weeks at a time. She told me tonight that he is a selfish person and that if he truly loved me he would have gotten help for the depression. Oddly, she has been depressed before and suicidal which you would think would make her more understanding. I asked her if when she contiplated suicide was she selfish? She said yes. I said but are you a selfish person and she said no. I said that was the same for him. Sure him leaving me and his family was "selfish" but at his core, is he selfish? Absolutely not. She thinks because she was able to conquer her depression that if he really loved me, he would have fought his depression. It makes me sad to think she cant see the amazing guy that is buried under the depression. I know, without a doubt, if he did get a handle on the depression, that he would NOT be selfish at all. It is hard to understand why others cant see the true person under the depression.
I hope those that are struggling know that not everyone will abandon you in your time of suffering. There are people out there that see the real you and would do anything to help.
I encourage all those suffering from depression to not only tell your loved ones what you are going through, but also to seek professional help. And for those of you who love a person suffering from depression, have compassion and understanding for their struggle. Know they do not intentionally hurt you and deep down they still love you even if they cant show it.

Thanks for reading.

p.s. I also struggle with depression and anxiety but I did get help and between medication and coping techniques, I am able to be myself again.
Luci
As a person on the DID end of this interaction with my (our?) own partner, I would appreciate being approached as a different person when my alters switch. Get to know me again. Because I find it really agitating when I'm approached romantically as the same person who is in the relationship, and how everything already feels assumed of me to behave exactly as my alter regardless of whether this is the case or your intention. Having to mask our whole lives as one singular alter to avoid being ostracized or alienated, this is a burden that everyone except for the alter being imitated is fed up with and traumatized by more likely than not.

From the story you told, it sounds like you know when your partner's alters switch.

I'm sorry this was written in the first/second person. But maybe apply this to your situation with a grain of salt.
Sean Gunderson
Thanks for sharing this experience! While the decision to start or leave a job is big, such decisions also contain much power. It sounds like you chose to face that difficulty with courage and empower yourself by leaving a workplace that was not conducive to your mental health. I'm glad that you recognize the role mental health plays in our lives. I hope that you find a job that is both rewarding and meets your mental health needs. Please continue turning to HealthyPlace for trusted information on mental health.
Buddy
You can understand how everyone feels?